It was a boys birthday, his mom died of cancer, his dad of aids, and all of his siblings were put in a gas chamber. Happy Birthday

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Jews are human beings. Pizza is a type of food.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's black and white and red all over? A modern abstract painting

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know why.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Knock, Knock. Lol jk, we all know knock knock jokes fricken suck.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What did the prostitute say to the president of the United States? Good morning Mr. President. She had managed to leave the sex industry, finished her education and was doing secretarial work in the White House.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the girl blush when she opened the fridge? Because she saw the salad dressing

thumb_up thumb_down +27

An alcoholic is someone you don't like who drinks as much as you do.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Whats better than winning an award? Not having your family shot to death

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the boy make a horribly unfunny anti joke? He was bored.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A white man, a black man and an asian walked into a bar. They got a drink and discussed multiple issues of the day and then went their seperate ways home.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's the difference between a convertible and a dead baby? One's in my garage, and one's a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did I lose a card game to a cat? Cause he was a cheetah!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

There was a boy named Steven, a son of a rich business man. Steven was an interesting child though, as he always kept care to one of his possessions. That possession being a plain, old, brown box. On Steven's fourth birthday his father said he could have anything in the world he wanted, just name it. Steven said he wanted two quarters to put in his box. The father agreed and gave his son two quarters to put in his box. Every year the father would say he could have anything he wished for, and Steven just asked for two quarters. Nothing more. On Steven's 18th birthday he got into a severe car crash. The father stood over the hospital bed where Steven lay. "I can get you the best doctors in the world. They can save you, please let me get you this for your birthday!" The boy shook his head. "All I want is two quarters" Steven replied. The father was distraught. "Son, tell me why you've wanted these two quarters every year you have been alive instead of anything else in the world". The boy complied. "Fine I'll tell you." Then Steven died before he could tell the father. The End.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's red and bad for your teeth? A Brick

thumb_up thumb_down +25

I started writing poetry the other day: POETR That's coming along nicely.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What does a penguin and a watermelon have in common? They all come from Earth.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A young boy is concerned about the well- being of his father, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

I'm black and I will beat your children At checkers, they can have red

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What did the dead man say to God? I'm dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops