Today i decided to burn calories, so I grabbed my lighter from the counter and put it in my pocket and proceeded to the treadmill.

If a small quiz is a quizicle then what is a small test? A quiz.

What did the 3 month old puppy get for Valentines day? Heart Worms. What'd he get for Christmas? Put down.

A duck walked up to a lemonade stand. The owner of the stand marveled at how close such an adorable duck was to him and proceeded to sell lemonade undisturbed.

Two dogs went out for a walk. Then their master took them home.

"knock knock?" ITS 2012 WE HAVE DOOR BELLS!!!

what's worse than the holocaust? nothing.

Q. Why was 6 afraid of 7? A. Because 7 was a scary dude.

That was slightly painful. I would appreciate it if you would stop such actions in the future

Lol, she does not think anything, she knows. Its not unfaithfulness if you ask for permission and are granted so because the trust is strong and mutual.

why was the woman in the kitchen? she was being held hostage there by Bob Saget

what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

Q: Why does the black guy eat watermelon A: Because it's a delicious nutritious snack

What's worse than sitting through a boring class? Sitting on a bus that a terrorist is about to blow up.

Why did lil' Jenny fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Whats red but smells like blue paint? Red paint

How many Bedouins do you need to change a light bulb? 2, one is changing the bulb and the second is powering the generator.

What did Justin beiber get for Christmas? A dildo.

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a PS3? Michael was a succesful dancer, singer-songwriter, musician, and philanthropist, whereas a PS3 is a games console.

How do chinese name their kids? They drop silverware

What's big white and can't fly? -Half of America Whats big brown and can't fly? -Crap

The Piglodocus has been featured in films such as "Jurassic Pork" and "Land before Swine".

Q - What do you call a hamburger without pickles? A - You call it a hamburger just without the pickles.

Nero? You are alive? Holy shit! You are like so my hero! I love you man! I was so saddened to hear you where tortured and killed, but then I read about this "Axel Knight" and hoped it was you, it sure sounded like you! Please tell me its no joke, you are a hero around these parts, and we really miss you, honestly sir, is it true point zero has become some sort of utopia or are the painkillers making you a bit Hazy? I am Erica by the way, still with the order, but what is this about your empire?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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