Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Roses are red Violets are blu Doogie is gay I have no friends

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Why was the woman happy to give birth to a beautiful, healthy child? Just kidding, she had an abortion.

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Roses are red Violets are blue This font is black You smell like shit

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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Hillary Clinton and 2 male aides were on a plane on a Friday evening which us not unusual for a secretary of state.

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Why was King Triton mad at Ariel? Her grades were under the C.

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Why are bannanas bendy? Because unlike cucumbers bannas are not grown in a tube and are left to grow at their own pace.

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Q: Why was jimmy's mom crying? A: Because her doctor said their were going to get rid of he cancer, 5 minutes later hey came back in and told her that he had made a mistake and that was for someone else, she was actually only had a month to live.

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How do you kill a deer? You don't, you just let it be because that's what a decent human being would do.

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Knock Knock. Whose there? Fed-Ex, here's your new brother.

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Emily Walker.

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It's weird how two of the SAME jokes can get different ratings.

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Scenario: Two guys are out hunting. Two guys are walking and a one falls down. The other calls 911 and the guy still standing asks what to do. The person at the hospital told him to make sure his friend was dead, then heard a gunshot. The guy who called said "Now what do I do?"

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what do you call a bunch of black people in a pool cocoa puffs

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Why did the boy live on the street? He was an orphan.

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Q: what's wrong with this sentence? My dogs is running in the garden A: I don't have a garden

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, I am blind.

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How many tortoises does it take to change a light bulb? One. Just don't expect it to be done quick.

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your momma's so stupid, she starved to death in a supermarket i probably would too...considering all the good shit needs to be cooked

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? How would she know? shes blind, deaf and mute; and incapable of knowing what she received.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Steven. Steven who? Steven your neighbor, may I please come in?

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If God created the world, including man kind, why do we worship him? We are corrupt, selfcentered, animal slaughterers. He made us this. So, Why?

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Your Mom The End.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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