Knock Knock CUM IN!

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

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Why couldn't the horse open the door? - Because it was locked...Beeeeeeeeeeeeeef Jelly

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What has a black, blue, and red all over? Timmy. He was mugged, and vigorously raped.

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There are 2 muffins in an oven One of the muffins says to the other 'Jeez it's hot in here' Then the other muffin replied, 'OH MY GOD IT'S A FRICKEN TALKING MUFFIN!!!!!!!!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The loss of originality in anti joke formats. And hypocrisy.

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Why wasn't the door a door? It was a jar.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swings? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Sarah

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What's the diffrence between a hockey puck, and an african child? They're both black, but usualy african children aren't round!

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What is the difference between a black man dead in the middle of the road... and a deer dead in the middle of the road? One is a human and one is an animal

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Why did Jimy fell down the stairs, because he was adopted.

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How long does it take for a dead baby to explode in the microwave? I don't know, I was too busy masterbating.

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What is brown and sticky? A Stick

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What do you call a zebra eating Cheerios? A zebra eating Cheerios.

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How do you break your fan in the summer You dont its hot and you need it

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I would tell you a joke about a pencil but there would be no point.

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My Mom was strutting down the runway. Then she got trampled by a plane.

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Q. What did the father say to his son? A. Nothing, he just hit him with his belt. His wife tried to intervene, but she too was hit by said belt.

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a glass of water. A few seconds later he drinks the water.

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Jewish guy walks into a bar. He owns the place.

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Why did Fred fall off the bike? He was a shoe.

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for his birthday? A bicycle.

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What did the black guy say after coming home from school? "I just got home from school."

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What did the bank teller say to Santa Claus? May I help you?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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