What's the same between a white guy and a black guy? They are both white except for the black guy.

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What's orange and not an orange? An orange.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Q: What did the mute kid say to his mother ?

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So a guy walks up to a gay guy and says: "You are a fag." The gay guy says: "That is very offensive, you jerk." So the guy says: "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know what it meant" and the gay guy says: "I accept your apology." Then the gay guy crosses the street and gets hit by a bus

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A little boy is going to school when he is stopped by a stranger. The stranger tells the little boy, when his teacher asks him why he is late, just say willytop. The boy looks at the stranger oddly, but proceeds to go to school. He arrives 5 minutes late, and is teacher isn't that happy. His teacher asks him why he is late. All the boy says is Willytop. The teacher looks at him horrified, and sends him to the office. Well, the boy arrives in the principals office, and the principal asks him why he was sent down. All the boy said was Willtop. The Principal was so horrified that he expelled the boy from school. Well, the boy went home, to find his parents in the living. They told the boy they knew he was expelled, but they wanted to know why. All the boy said was Willytop. The parents were so horrified by this that they kicked him out of the house. Well, the boy is now walking to dark town streets, when he is stopped by a cop. The cop asks him why he is walking the streets alone. All the boy says is Willytop. The cop is so disgusted, that he kicks the boy out of town. Well, the boy is now sitting in a bar, and the bartender asks him why he is alone. All the boy said was Willytop. The bartender looked at him horrified, but before the bartender could say anything, the boy says "Please sir, I was kicked out of school, my house and even my hometown because of willytop. what does it mean sir?" The bartender nods, and tells the boy to come with him across the street, because if he tells him in the bar, the other people may get mad. Well, the boy and the bartender are across the street from the bar. The bartender opens his mouth, but before he could speak, a drunk driver hits them both.

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What's worse then your pets death? I don't know I asked you.

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Yo Mama so stupid she thought "Dunkin Doughnuts" was a basketball team.

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mary had a little lamb it's fleece was white as snow and everywhere that mary went it did a massive shit

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Billy wanted a toy for Christmas. Sadly, Billy died before Christmas.

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What is the name of the mermaid on the Starbucks logo? No one knows, she ran away many years ago of shame. It's undiscovered why.

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff.

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what's small, red and sits in the corner? A naughty strawberry.

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What do you call a black flying an airplane? A pilot you racist bastard.

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You are so down to earth, and never confuse that with "simple minded".

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Did you know Helen Keller had a doll house? She didn't either.

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Why are Asians yellow? Because that is their natural skin color

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roses are red violets are blue kyle brown and pj nosaki have big balls

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Why did the plane crash into the mountain? The Pilot was a tomato

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Why did the gay kid drop his ice cream Because he got punched in the face.

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Your moma is so fat, that Jabba the Hutt says: "Damn!!!"

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You cant spell chorus with out... Vagina!

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What's worse than a worm in your apple That one time I rapped and killed your mom, oh and happy birthday prick

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If polar bears were pink they'd be very easy to find

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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