Why did Santa die? Because he got diabetes from so many cookies

What do you call an animal killed on the side of the road? A false accusation towards an inanimate object that has no other purpose then providing a safe and smooth ride for drives all around the world.

Instructions to make origami. 1.) Staple bagels to face 2.) Ask someone else to do it. 3.) Hang yourself because you are too stupid to figure it out yourself

Q: How to fit 10 babies in a suitcase? A: By blender Q: How to get the babies out of the suitcase? A: Using a straw.

Yo' mom is so fat, She should probably consider a low fat diet in which no more than 30% of the calories are from fat.

A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

What do you call six white guys on a bench? Six white guys at the park

what's funnier then 15? definitely not 14

Why didn't Jacob marry Bella from Twilight? You have to be real to marry someone

My daughter's so smart, that instead of texting K, she writes Potassium.

Roses are reds, Viloets are blue, Thank God I'm a christian, And not a jew.

Q: why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: because it was dead.

What did the potato say to the man It said nothing it is a potato

Why did the blonde jump off the bridge? She was clinically depressed and wanted to end her life

a man walks into a bar, what does he say answer: oww..

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind, not to mention deaf and mute.

knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... You mom's a whore.

When u send someone fudge, u must send a note along with it! Roses are red Violets are blue Fudge is brown Here's some fudge

a guy walks in to a bar in iraq. 10 people died because of it

roses are red violets are red? trees are red!? who the hell cut themselves?

Why did the stoner visit anti-joke.com? Because he was bored, and probably kinda high.

Q: what do you call a hooker you pay in spaghetti? A: a pasta-tute.

Doctor, doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains! That's a rather strange psychological problem I think you should consult a professional psychologist rather than see me.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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