I used to be able to walk, but then I took an arrow to the knee. It tore my acl and shattered my kneecap.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why didn't the dog want to cross the road? there was a flea market on the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Mini mouse was brutally killed n Oakland Now Mickey is a Chinese member of the crips in Compton Remember don't forget to see the new Disney movie, Mickey Goes Gang-Bangin

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What do you call someone who doesn't have a soul? A ginger

thumb_up thumb_down -24

do you know cadbury choclate buttons? yeah, you know the white ones come out now, do you why? so the black kids can get there face dirty too

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What did the chair say to the guy? Nothing, as it is a chair and chairs can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Malcom: Knock Knock. Jessica: Who's there? Malcom: It's Malcom. Jessica: Okay. Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

what did the boy with cancer want for christmas? a gun

thumb_up thumb_down -24

I walks over to da shop de oother day and there was this guy and he was like... I bought some petrol. LOoooooooooL

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the boy not get picked up from soccer? His mom was in a fatal car accident. His dad simply forgot.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

what's worse than finding an worm in your apple? Finding HALF a worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Someone with a lame joke: What's black and white and red all over? Smart person who decides to mess with him: Nothing, if it is red all over how can it be black and white???????

thumb_up thumb_down -24

One day, a mother was speaking with her daughters. "Mommy," the first one said, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we brought you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second daughter said, "Why did you name me Rose?" ""Because when we brought you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMBWWAAAAGGGH!" the last daughter cried. She was born with severe special needs and is incapable of coherent speech.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

why do jewish people have big noses? because air is free

thumb_up thumb_down -24

This is hypothetical remember, just examples with no roots in real life events. The problem with your former employee, was that he would easily have played the victim, certain organizations would have paid him a fortune for the intel he had collected, and surely also agreed to let him walk away, and get you and your small (relatively) crack team death penalty on the spot, just like the underground, you would have been branded terrorists simply because certain people would have earned billions by doing so. The wizard would most likely have gone free, as long as he shared every tiny bit of info, then the cops, the feds, would have blamed it all on you for being his supervisor, you would not have survived the ordeal, trust me.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Q: How do you fit 30 Jews in one car? A: Two in the front, two in the back, and the rest in the ash tray.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What did the white person say to the black person? Nothing because he was black

thumb_up thumb_down -24

what you get time to go with? - a clock

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What do you call a man who tripped on a rock? A man who tripped on a rock.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Knock Knock Who's there? Not Harry Styles! - Louis

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What did the orphan boy get for Christmas? Cancer. What did he get for his birthday? He didn't make it that far...

thumb_up thumb_down -24

what's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a trampoline? obviously quite a lot due to the fact that they are two completely different ideas with little to no relation to each other.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What does aaron eat for dinner Answer- Fat Finger HAHAHAHAHA

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops