mark is religion

An slutty attractive secretary went into her boss' office He killed her.

What's the difference between a Lawyer and a hooker? Job description, income, and an incredibly large list of other things.

Why does my friend pick up trash? Because he is a garbageman

What did the pear say to the apple? Fred, you delusions are getting worse and i'm getting a divorce.

yo mama is so fat she has more rolls than basken robins does flavors

Why did Suzy drop her ball? Because roughly 5 years ago she was part of a car crash violently tearing off both of her arms. Knock knock. Who's there. NOT SUZY!

A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

What did the orange say to the lemon? We are both alike but a differnt color

There is no "I" in "TEAM" However, there is a "T" an "E" an "A" and an "M"

Knock Knock Who’s there? Boo Boo who? Ah don’t be sad, Boo’s here to cheer you up!

Two black males walk into the bar due to circumstances they had to go home early one of them has to leave early to tend to his ill wife, and the other enjoys his night drinking and making small talk with new friends

Q: What's the upside to your otherwise miserable life? A: You only got raped twice last week.

What is Jetlag? When your computer is running too many applications/programs, thus causing the game Jetman on Facebook to lag.

A man walks into a bar and says "ow"; he stepped on a nail sticking up through one of the floorboards. He then sues the bartender for a large sum of money because of the injury he sustained, and causes the bartender to lose everything he owns in order to pay off his debt.

Doctor: I'm sorry about your disease, young man. It looks like your time is up. Man: NO! How much time to I have? Doctor: Five. Man: Five years? Five months? Five weeks? Doctor: Four... Three...

A new born baby is left alone in his crib after a long day of playing, He gets taken out of his crib for his first meal with his grandparents, he is excited, His grandparents come in and after the usual praising of the child they sit down for dinner, They are having chicken, His mother puts the spoon to his mouth, He chews it and swallows it, It gets stuck in his throat and he suffocates and dies.

if life hands u melons, make melonade.

how many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? 2 one to hold the latter and one to put it in

Why did the aisian man get pulled over? Because he was going over the speed limit .

Do you know what killed the cat? Feline AIDS

Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but smell this towel, you won't remember a thing.

Roses are OK, Violets do the trick, C'mon and let me whip out my Dick.

What's purple, green, and orange? Dead baby with slashed floaties. What's black, purple, and orange? Same baby two weeks later.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...