"Knock knock" "Who's there?" Not Sally because she has no arms ~Sally jokes

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Your mother is so classy, when I asked her to order at a fast food drive through she decided to park the car a eat inside.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Due to a lack of awareness of its surrounding, it died attempting to cross the road.

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Q:What did the duck say to the other duck A:We are both ducks

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Comedian: Do you all wanna hear a joke? Audience: Yeah!!! Comedian: Okay! What did the bad comedian say to the audience? Audience: What?!! Comedian: Chicken butt. Thank you, you've been a great crowd. Good night!

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What did the thin Italian say to the fat Italian? I don't know, I can't speak Italian.

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What does these 3 words all have in common? terrifiant, hrollvekjandi, Przera?aj?ce They all mean the same thing describing Ian! CREEPY

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What did the bride do on her wedding day? Get married.

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What does Adolf Hitler hate more than Jews? Nothing.

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You: Want to hear a joke? Person: Yeah You: Me too

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Whats big, grey, and cant climb trees? A carpark

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? They're really good at it

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what's white and sticky semen

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Why doesn't Jonathan Walk across the road? Because he is in a wheelchair...

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whats in a red suit with a white beard and jolly......st.nick jerking of and blowwing a load in your stocking while taking a shit on you coffee table before theen hanging it back up over the fire place

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(Pretend you're an orphan.) Knock knock. Who's there? Not your parents.

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Who is stupid and no one likes him. Me. :(

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Haiku doesn't rhyme, And neither does this

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Whiney the poo and the blustery day.

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An Asian walks into a bar and says, "1???????????"

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How many women does it take to changed a light bulb? 12. 11 to form a committee and 1 to make her boyfriend do it.

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I'm on the Seafood Diet. I eat seafood to replace fatty red meats, in conjunction with fruit and vegetables.

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YOU'VE WON A FREE IPAD!!!!! PRESS CTRL+W TO CLAIM YOUR PRIZE!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops