how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 16 if the ice cream melts

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I'm colorblind.

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Why did the woman drop her keys? She was being raped.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Im a Jew, Fart yourself.

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says what will it be? The duck replies "lemonade!"

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knock knock who's there? hope

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Rain rain go away, and don't come back or else i will kill your family.

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How many kleptomaniacs does it take to screw in a lightbulb? What lightbulb?

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What do you get when you mix red and yellow together? rellow

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An atom walks into a bar. Did it grow legs?

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http://www.google.com/imgres?q=harry+styles+funny&hl=en&safe=active&biw=1024&bih=398&gbv=2&tbm=isch&tbnid=lc8_fNCatYHOqM:&imgrefurl=http://www.vervegirl.com/harry-being-typical-harry/&docid=86Gw8eNJ73tOYM&imgurl=http://www.vervegirl.com/cms/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/harry-styles-300.jpg&w=300&h=400&ei=q4vHT9XwHYL48gSJoJzJDw&zoom=1

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind kid with two stump arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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You know whats worse than finding a fly in your soup? 9/11

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what did the one girl say to the other girl? i like your shoes.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Which brains do zombie like most? Zombies dont exist.

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-What did George Clooney say to Jennifer Lawrence? -"Hi!"

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What has a pie and my hand got in common? It's got meringue on it.

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In Soviet Russia, millions die under an oppressive and uncaring regime that uses communism to justify its inhumane policies.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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two muffins are in a oven the one muffin says jee its hot in here and the other muffin says wow a talking muffin

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Whats the worst part about being fat. Your fat.

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A: Can I get a tall white Russian. B: No. A: Why not? B: Because this is a Barnes and Nobles. However, we do have a Starbucks, and I can offer you a venti caramel iced coffee"

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Why was Timmy crying when he got home? His family was dead in a pile with a pitchfork going through each of their bodies

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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