- Anti Joke

why do woman love the twilight books? i have no idea woman can't read

Why did the man walk into the wall? He was blind.

what's worse than people who aren't funny? ryan vallee

how do you know if your friend is your best friend? if he cries you cry, if he laughs you laughs, if he jumps out a window you laugh again.

Why are people so quiet at golf game? Because its such a boring sport.

Why did Sally drop her Ice Cream Cone? Because her dog licked her butthole.

Why did the turtle take so long on his run? Because he never went on a run he walked.

Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock, whos there? Not sally

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause he felt like it.

Want to hear a joke? Women's rights.

Nah really, I start giggling like a dork whenever weird porn or whatever shows up on my computer, its just too weird. Fine ill use my glasses then, thanks for the comment by the way, I was really regretful for sending you that pic, but then again I did not have contacts then, nor did I want to photoshop anything.

See now, that is because you consider yourself my submissive on a both concious and subconcious level, your body and mind wants me to take care of you. I could say it is because I read minds, but why read minds, when I can create them, why read the future, when you can create it. Finally, lets take a look into the word, nerve endings yes? Not nerve endings baby, its called Suggestion. But seriously though, lets put the word nerve endings on top of the word suggestions again there. Nerve endings, did I mention it works on your butt too? You see, usually you would say no, but you do know that now that I am your master, you do and enjoy as I say? See you baby. Moral: "Feel the grove, I control the way you move"

So, this cheerio is in love with a beautiful frosted cheerio. He asks her on a date. She says no, because she only dates other frosted cheerios. So the cheerio works really hard at his job and is promoted to a honey-nut cheerio. So he asks her out again. She says no because she only dates frosted cheerios. So he works even harder and is made a frosted cheerio. He asks her out again and she accepts. 4 months later after a relationship built on trust and understanding they are married and live a long and fullfilling life together.

why did the kid struggle in school? because hes mentally retarted

What's white and red all over? A white guy who walked in the ghetto.

When life gives you cancer, make cancer-aids.

Jimmy: I'm like hey, what's up, hello. Jon: I've already met you.

What did the retarded handicap say to the bully who called him the biggest retard in the world? "atleast I didn't make SOPA"

Have you seen Hellen Keller's children? No. They look just like her.

What is the difference between an anti-joke and a joke? The word anti before anti-joke.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Vacuum, purple, zebra.

Timmy needed to use the restroom in class, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I go use the restroom?". The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said, "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

what did the unicorn say to the centaur? nothing because neither exist

Hold on, please hold on! I will explain, it is my name, but I don't know whats so wrong with it at all... Please give me five minutes, I need to use the bathroom, please don't go just yet, don't be mad at me, what have I done wrong now? I mean if you are gonna go to sleep or something please do not be upset with me.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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