why did the boy cry because i punched him so hard in the face he shit out his teeth for the next three weeks

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A man walks up to his boss and asks "Do you want to hear a funny joke?". His boss replied,"Yes". Before the man could finish his joke, his boss had a heart attack and died instantly. The next day, when he's in his car with his wife, he asks "You want to hear a joke?", the wife replied "Sure,". before the man could finish his joke, a car hit them and the wife died but the man happened to survive. The next day, he sat on a bench mourning, his friend walked up to him and asked, "Why are you sad?". the man answered, "Every time I try and tell a joke someone dies!", his friend said, "That's not true, just tell me the joke." "Ok" "Two Pigeons walk into a-". Before he can finish his joke his friends is kidnapped and killed. Sadly, the man walks to a ledge, jumps off and commits suicide. The End

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Knock Knock Who's There 42

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A guy walks into a bar. But this was a bar like a pole, so the man ended up with a broken nose.

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I'm funnY!!! Haha pënis

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Anne frank dies days before camp was liberated.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven kind of looked like an alligator.

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Q: How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart? You don't. You just shut up and listen.

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test test

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Okay, this is a real joke: A guy slips on a banana and falls down in the most funny way ever, so a girl nearby starts laughing when she suddenly realizes the guy is bleeding profoundly, so she runs over to help, but it turns out the blood was just ketchup so... Just then they both got run over and killed by a car.

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Hey I've got two stories. This one and the next one.

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The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your action

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"To tea to to to" -- russian tourist, asking for two tea to room 22. (DOKA)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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People who are addicted to brake fluid just can't stop.

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What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

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why was the man afraid of the tree? Because it ate his mother!!!!!!

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*Wear a Mario costume* What happened to Luigi? I ate him.

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Yesterday, I was assasinated.

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Dogta I don got da aids yeah? Well Sigh... Man I am so sorry, I got the positive, and the uh.. Good news... Whats the good news? I hate you! Whats the positive news? You dont have teh aids.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A kind hearted serial killer who will win your heart emotionally and then shoot you to death unexpectedly.

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A bunch of kids are in a treehouse. The treehouse falls out of the tree and kills everyone in the treehouse and the two little girls playing underneath. It was sad.

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what is red with 2 legs? half a cat

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justin bieber over spongebob *snicker*

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops