Why did the guy fall into the ocean? He was surfing

A black man walks into a bar and he orders a margarita. The bartender says that the margaritas are exceptionally delicious in this bar. He was right.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because I hit her with a shovel.

So a guy walks into a bar. Ouch. It was a gay bar.

A Jew walks into a gas chamber...

What do you call a man named Cornelius? Well, he prefers to go by his middle name, Eric, because he was teased as a child for being named Cornelius.

Excuses are like assholes: Gay men like to have sex with them.

Q: What would happen if Chuck Norris was hit by an Astroid A: He would die.

why did the chicken cross the road it didnt

What did the fish say after it's head was cut off? Nothing, it was a fish.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball? Because he would scare the shit out of everyone, and come to think of it wasn't even sure he had been invited.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house. "Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "The chicken"

What's similar between a black man and jelly babies? Nothing

Why did the boy have to ride the bus? Because both his parents died.

Q: What did the air freshener say to the car??? A: Nothing. Air fresheners are inanimate objects

Q: Wy couldn't the T-rex grab the other Dinosor? A: Because he is extinct.

What happened to the house that was made without concrete? It fell over.

A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says, "What'll it be?" The horse never replied.

Why did? Yes

what hurts more than getting shot in the arm Getting shot in both arms!

What is it... Michael J Fox has a small one, modonna doesnt have one, Arnold Shwatznegger has a long one, the pope doesn't use his, and bill clinton uses his a lot. A last name

What did the cow say to the other cow? "Baaa", he had an identity crisis.

A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some Chap-stick, and put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because, as all people know, ducks cannot speak. However, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting a prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need Chap-stick anyway, since he has no lips.

Why did the chicken cross the road? That is none of your concern as it invades his freedom of privacy.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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