A horse walks into a bar Barman: Why the long face? Horse: just had a stroke

Whats similar between an apple and a black guy there is no similarities between them

Knock Knock Who’s there? Tom Tom who? Tom Pearson? Oh Tom, I wasn’t expecting you til 3pm, please come in.

a man walked into a bar....

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

What do you call a cow without legs? Disabled.

What happened when the woman sent back the pair of shoes she bought on eBay? She obtained a refund from the seller under eBay's return policy.

What's worse than a dead baby? Two dead babies.

This planking craze is really taking over... my elderly nextdoor neighbour has been planking in her garden for three days straight!

Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes You should probably get yourself checked.

There's two Cherys in a bath one chery asks the other one to pass the soap the other chery said what do I look like, a typewriter?

What's grammatically incorrect about this sentence? Nothing. I lied.

*Knock, Knock* Who's there? George. George who? George Ronald.

Q. How can you tell if your arm is broken? A. Break it.

What did Billy get his dad for Father's day? Nothing, his dad was killed by a spinning helicopter blade when Billy was 3.

Q. What did the barber say to the Italian kid? A. Do you want your hair cut or should I just change the oil.?

Why can't Stevie Wonder read? He has retinopathy of prematurity and was born blind.

A horse walked into a bar. The bartender served him a beer and said "why the long face?", to which the horse replied "neigh". The bartender was later fired for incompetence and serving beer to a horse.

why did the african american man get shot? he partook in a gang life

* How many roads must a man walk down before you call him a man? * He just need to go to the Register Office and change his name to "a man"

Once upon a time, there was an ugly duckling. All the other ducklings made fun of the ugly duckling for being so ugly, and the little duckling felt bad. "Why do I have to be such an ugly duckling?," he asked. However one day, the duckling grew up and became........well, an ugly duck. Turns out he was just an ugly duck. The end.

Why was the boy walking in circles? One of his feet was nailed to the floor...

Knock Knock Who's There Seventeen Thirty Eight I'm like hey what's up hello Seen yo pretty ass soon as you came in that door I just wanna chill, got a sack for us to roll Married to the money, introduced her to my stove Showed her how to whip it, now she remixin' for low She my trap queen, let her hit the bando We be countin' up, watch how far them bands go We just set a goal, talkin' matchin' Lambos Got 56 a gram, prob' a 100 grams though Man, I swear I love her how she work the damn pole Hit the strip club, we be letting bands go Everybody hating, we just call them fans though In love with the money, I ain't never letting go And I get high with my baby (baby) I just left the mall, I'm getting fly with my baby, yeah

READ IT ALL> whats the difference between a jew and a pizza...the jew is a human with living features and organs that keep his body hydrated while also keeping his blood pumped throughout him, otherwise the pizza is a circular, doe based cake like food topped with a fine layer of cheese and in some cases topped of with other substances such as pineapple or ham :)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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