Q: Why couldn't the black man swim? A: Because ever since he was a child, he has never taken swimming lessons before.

knock, knock who's their? police get down on the ground!

What do you call a man with no arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob. What do you call a man with no arms or legs in front of your door? Matt. What do you call a man with no arms or legs hanging on your wall? Art.

what is the tastiest veggie? veggies aren't tasty.

BOB:i feall like a hotdog JOE:u r what u eat BOB:no wonder your a d!(k JOE:f*** u

like this if you think what ever you want to..

What would Walt Disney do if he were alive today? Gurgle and choke inside his cryogenic vault as liquid nitrogen flooded into his lungs.

what did the boy with cancer want for christmas? a gun

what is the worst thing a bout four black men driving a Cadillac off a cliff? they were my friends

Your mom is so ignorant that she in completely unaware how the premature termination of QE2 in conjunction with a potential US credit downgrade could substantially impact her fixed income portfolios and hinder her ability to retire in the desired time frame.

Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you. I slipped you a roofie, get ready for me.

I GOT YOUR BUTT PUSSY!

What dinosaur makes honey? The Bee Rex.

Q: What would George Washinton do if he was alive today? A: Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

My arms get tired from carrying my big diick everywhere, well at least it's better than dragging it

Whats black white and red all over? A decapitated panda.

What do you think 3 black men want when the come and knock on your car window? They just want directions.

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

Three men are walking on a beach when they find a lamp. They rub it, and a genie comes out. It tells them that they each get one wish, and to choose wisely. They each decide to discuss what to wish for with their wives. Their wives take them to a local hospital, where they receive treatment for hallucinations.

How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

What's worse than cutting yourself? Deadly tornadeos.

How many Jews can you fit in an oven? None, it's illegal.

Man: Excuse me sir, is this where I turn in my library book? Farmer: You must be really lost, this is a farm.

What's black and blue and hates sex? A rape victim.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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