Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the cupboard cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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What's worse then the WNBA? Nickelback.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Q: What's grey and can't climb trees A: A car park

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What did the Catholic Priest say to the Altar Boy shortly after sex? Nothing. The feelings of shame and revulsion the priest felt about what he had just done meant he couldn't look him in the eye let alone talk to him.

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Why did the man throw a clock? In retaliation for his wife having thrown a vase at him. The couple has a history of domestic violence. More than one friend has suggested counselling.

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"Lassie, Lassie, come quick! Timmy is in the well!" "I'm a dog," replies Lassie. "You folks have ropes, ladders, and opposable thumbs. What the hell could I possibly do to help?" With that final act of disobedience, Lassie was turned into fertilizer.

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What does Pluto and a creamsicle have in common? Neither of them are a planet.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? A: Shark bait.

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Why did the deer cross the road? The overpopulation of man has caused an expansion of construction into the habitat of the deer and it has required him to occasionally frequent human populated areas.

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What do you call a redneck virgin? A seven year old who can run faster than her brothers.

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Continents are large islands.

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How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? one, hes an electrician

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What do you call somebody who can't walk? Handicapped

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Doctor, doctor, I have a cavity! Go to the dentist.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding poo in your shoe.

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Q: What did the Rapist say to the Little girl before they got in to the Van? A: Get In the Van

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Why is it stupid to call your son Bethany? It is commonly a girl's name.

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why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

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Why are Indians so bad at football? Curry

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Roses are red Violets are blue I've got to say I hate you!

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Why was the blonde on the train tracks? Because she was tied up by a madman on crack.

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What did the little boy with cancer get for christmas? Nothing. He was a jew. Jew's don't celebrate christmas.

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Whats fun about having sex with twenty six year olds? Theres twenty of them

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops