Who died first the cow or the cow? The Cow

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens can walk wherever the hell they want. Leave them alone.

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Tilt your screen back .

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Why couldn't the cat drink milk? It Didn't have a face.

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape

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there was a Black and Mexican in a car who was driving? the cop

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What kind of coffee did they drink on the Titanic? They didn't. They all died.

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A gay man takes another gay man home after a wild night at the city's top club. They choose to be safe and not have gay sex.

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Your d is so small that when you had a boner and walked into the wall....... YOU BROKE YOUR NOSE! Millimeter Monster bro

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Knock Knock! Who's there? The Police The Police who? We're sorry Ma'am your son has died in a car accident... --------- Knock Knock! Who's there? Not your son

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An alien spacecraft picks up human transmissions from Earth. They continue on in silence and disgust.

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What do you call Madeline McCann at the bottom of the sea? Drowned Madeline McCann.

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Why did the man ask the IPhone to marry him He was smoking weed

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Yo mama so stupid, she waited for the stop sign to say go

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how do stick a dead baby into a blender and why???????? feet first so u can see the reaction on top.

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Why did the black man enjoy KFC. Because like many foods, it contains monosodium glutamate (MSG) a flavor enhancer that makes many foods taste better. It however had nothing to do with race or cultural background.

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What's the difference between oreos and your opinion? I asked for your opinion.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a train? Because she's blind.

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your mom is so ugly that she is still a virgin, you don't exist you are just a figment of my imagination.

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What do a Nazi and a Democrat have in common? They are both members of a highly supported political faction.

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Why do so many black athletes drive black cadillac escalades? Because it's roomy and they deserve to reward themselves after they put in so much hard work trying to be the best player they can be.

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Whats the difference between a jew and firewood? Firewood is meant to be burned in a stove or firepit while jews are functioning members of society.

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Well, you need to develop a particular mindset, and while scienTITS claim that its not logical so it does not work... Well, SUGAR, thing is that the mind and emotions, cannot be explained logically either. Let me expand your mind (if I have not already) A astronomer meets up with a brain surgeon, the Astronomer says to the brain surgeon: I do not believe in god. Why? says the brain surgeon. Because I have studied most of the outer space and never found seen any trace of God.

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Duke Nukem censored line: What are you waiting for? the celebration of the day you crucified Jesus and ate his flesh and blamed it upon the anti christ because of... Victory? Because you know Jesus gave his life in order to prove that he was immortal and died for your sins because his life is eternal... Satan your Moral Man: Nah, lets just go with "what are you waiting for, christmas?" Now go celebrate you murdering your savior which said "ill be back" on the cross and returned three days later at his second coming? Seriously? I thought only Jesus: The guy that was totally an ARAB (deny it and be consumed in the flames of hell, not my problem), and Jesus: strikes back came out, where can I get Jesus: The third coming? Factoid: Yeah Jesus was totally a blonde haired white man which went clothed in the finest ARYAN silks, in addition he only drove in his MUSTANG 9001 and smoked Lucky Strike... Which did nothing for his luck...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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