You know what's funnier than 24? .... 9-11

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Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

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What do you call an blank test? an F

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Comes a giraffe on a scooter to the hospital and asks: 'can I have some flour?'.

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What did the man do when he went to the toilet went toilet

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What do you do when a sing is stuck inside your head? Put a gun to your head, and shoot the song to death. It will work. Trust me. Youll never hear the song again. Or anything again.

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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What do Sandusky and micheal Jackson have in common? They are both white.

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What would Loiter Squad be if the characters were white? A show.

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Roses are red violets are blue your dads got hair what happened to you

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Whats big, round and orange? A big round orange

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I do not want to know, you want to TELL ME so that I can increase the potency of the hypnotic suggestion by... Lets say... A number that if I said would work instantly? I wrote CONDOMS ARE FOR PUZZIES... Which kinda makes sense... Just a line, from the worst game ever.

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what's worse, ten babies stapled to a tree or one baby stapled to ten trees?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Most likely for no discernible reason as chickens are animals with poor reasoning skills.

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Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

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Q. Why didn't the man tell his girlfriend about his big lottery win? A. Because it was none of her business.

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What do you call a man who's arms have been amputated? It doesn't matter, he won't be able to pick up the phone.

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Why is red? He was just murmured by a phycopath.

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Why did the black guy cross the road? Because he was late for a meeting

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There once was a man from Dundee, Whose Limericks ended on line three. I don't know why.

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What's the same about a duck-billed platypus and a duck? They both have a duck bill on their face... Duh!

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What do you call a poor Donald Trump? Donald Trump

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Whats worse than getting shot in the foot? Watching each member of your family get shot in the foot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops