Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Patient: Doctor, do I have cancer? Doctor: Yes. Patient: Will I live? Doctor: No. Patient: So what do I do? Doctor: SUCK IT UP!!!

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Nothing.

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Q: What do you call a dog driving a car? A: A dog driving a car.

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Q. How do you make a chicken dance? A. I don't know I was asking you.

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Why is red? He was just murmured by a phycopath.

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Why wouldnt you want to hit a black man that is on a bike with your car? It mite be your bike

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Jesse gives his mom the stick for breakfast

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300 terrorists have a contest, they all jump off a tower and die. Who wins? Society.

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Whiney the poo and the blustery day.

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How do you make a Bong Ki mad? Call him a Bong Ki.

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A drunk guy walks into a car

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I like the color potato.

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What's big or small, can come in different colors, and would kill you if it was forced inside you? A refrigerator.

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A man gets home from work with red on his collar. His wife asks what it is. The man replies "I had sex with a young woman, your to old and you disqust me"

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Why did the car fall of the cliff? The dude driving the car was driving recklessly.

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roses are red violets are blue my dick hurts blue waffles

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Q:Why did the Mexican cross the border? A:To come to America to provide for his starving family.

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National security?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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What's brown and hides in the closet? The Diarrhea of Anne Frank.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? It's dependent on many factors, like the size of the babies and the tub. It would be a horrific endeavor, and you should probably stop thinking about such things.

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Neither did she.

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Why doesnt your dad like barrack Obama? because your dad is straight, hes not into men

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops