How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself pink and throw green banana at her.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? Neither one can ride a bicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: What do you call a black man's car being egged? A: A Hate Crime

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Your mothers so dumb that when she had to take a math test, she received a significantly lower grade than the rest of her classmates.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what did one tornado say to the other? im dizzy

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What are the differences between a black man and a park bench? One's a chair and ones a person.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Find x X + 2 = 5 ^ I found it

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why do eggs come in 12? because 13 is bad luck

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How do u get suzzy off a swing? You tell her to get off

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are blue Violets are red I got this backwards Carpets are nice

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Got Milk? Why yes! Yes I do!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

"Sticks and stones" the man said and shat on three different complex turtles

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How do you make a plumber cry You kill it's family

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do apples and black men both have in common? They are both people except for the apple

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Dont follow this link.......http://www.google.com/imghp?hl=en&q=blue+waffle&tab=wi

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M Factory Because she repeatedly wrote Ws

thumb_up thumb_down +6

- What do you call a black pirate? + A Nig-ARRRRRRRRRR - No, a pirate you fucking racist

thumb_up thumb_down +6

One day a boy asks his teacher what blue velvet is then the teacher says "we don't ask questions like that in my class go to principal's office now"so the boy goes to the principal's office and then the boy asks "what is blue velvet"then the principal says"no one says that in my school get out" so the boy goes home and asks his mom what is blue velvet then his mom says you don't say stuff like that in my house get out!so the boy see's the Mayer. So the boy asks the Mayer what blue velvet is then the Mayer says no one says that in my town get out of my town! So the boy see's a man and the boy goes to the man and the man asks what happend to you and the boy says well I got kicked out of school kicked out of my house and got thrown out of town just because i asked what blue velvet is! So the man tells the boy that there is a lady across the street. So the boy is in the road and then the boy gets ran over and dies. So the lesson here is look both ways before crossing a street

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: y does obama keep raising gas prices A: he dosent want anyone to be able to drive to the poles in november

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What happend to the man who walked into a forrest? He got raped by a giant vicious mutant spider

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How do you stop a rhino from charging? An ak-47

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Q: How do you get a giraffe into a refrigerator? A: You open the door put the giraffe in and the close the door. Q: How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? A: You open the door to the refrigerator take the giraffe out then put the elephant in and close the door. Q: The Lion King is hosting an animal conference, all the animals attend but one, which one is it? A: The elephant it's in the fridge Q: You have to cross a river that is inhabited by crocodiles how do you cross it? A: You swim across, the crocodiles are at the animal conference.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops