People are a lot like slinkies. Not really good for anything, but still bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs.

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Why couldn't little Tiffany play kickball with the rest of the kids during recess? Tiffany is a pencil.

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I saw a woman get burned alive on the news... That woman was my mom.

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"I am proud to be black and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Not racist. "I am proud to be white and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Racist and offensive to black people "I am proud to be asian and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Not racist "I am proud to be Ethiopian and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Said nobody, ever

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

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what do you call and man that has a twitch every time someone say tissue broken arm, leg, hand, collar bone and there iphone? A mentally and physically demented man that needs serious help from a psychotherapist otherwise matter would get increasingly worse

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What did Sally want for Christmas? Nothing, she is Jewish.

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A man walks into a bar, he now has a mild concussion

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why did the Chicken Cross the Road? Why must you question a Chicken's motives to Cross the Road?

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Your cat was in pain after after a stack of books suddenly fell on it. It's pain is extra-strong so you give it ExtraStrength Tylenol. Guess what happens next time? Nothing. It takes only 50mg to 60mg of Tylenol to poison a cat. 1 ExtraStrength Tylenol tablet is about 10 times that amount (500mg). You killed your cat. It's dead now and there is no "next time"..

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What do you call an Aboriginal in a yellow sleeping bag? An organised man, ready for the harsh winter ahead.

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Roses are red violets are red bushes are red oh shit my garden is on fire

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Why did Justin Bieber jump out of the airplane? He didn't, i pushed him

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Q. Whats does the kid and the dog have in common? A. The kid has Herpes.

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What happens when an old lady bumps into a black man in the middle of the night? He politely offers her help getting home and she accepts.

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your momma is so fat that she should be worried about her higher risk of heart disease, diabetes, and ugliness.

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What's better than winning a million dollars? Winning 2 million dollars!

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Q. Whats blue and looks like a bucket? A. a blue bucket Q. whats green and looks like a bucket? A. a blue bucket in disguise.

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What happened to thepeanut who went to NYC? He was assulted

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Knock Knock! Who's there? John.

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A blind man walks in a bar I mean like a metal bar But it didn't hurt He only laught

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what do friends and trees have in common? If you hit them with an axe multiple times they fall over

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What do you do to get someone to shut up? You hit with a brick

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What has two legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops