Q: Why does a zebra have stripes? A: Because Sarah Jessica Parker is a horse.

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Why did the Jewish population diminish in the '40s? Showers and Ovens

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Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because his face was stapled to the wall.

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If I met your mom before you was born, you would still be born.

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this is stupid .... yep

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Why did the tomato turn red? The salad pulled out a gun.

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blonde: your cute Gangster: wanna go back to my crib blonde: you mean you can go back in time?

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roses are red violets are blue i like elephants

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What did the alien say to the parachute? We're connected

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Q. Why didn't the Hero rescue the princess? A. Because he crunched some numbers, realized the incredible odds against him, and decided against it.

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Your mom is so stupid she has to get homeschooled for college!

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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dylan hodge wishes he could suck his own **** jokes thats what his mothers for

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So, a Turtle, a Giraffe, and a Hippopotamus walk into Stop-N-Shop. They are quickly excorted out and the Zoo is contacted to take the wild animals. The Manager wonders why they were there in the first place.

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Why was the frog sad? Because he had a boy's face stapled to his feet.

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What can fly, but can not swim? Malaysia Airlines Flight 370

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why did the duck swim upside-down -he was on quack

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Eeny meeny miny moe, Catch a piglet by its toe, If it squeals let it go, Or you'll be arrested for animal abuse and receive a heavy fine.

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Whats green and has wheels?? - Grass, I lied about the wheels

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Q: Who was shot 50 years ago? A: Abraham Lincoln was shot 50 years ago! (=

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whats worse than a chicken crossing the road 10 dead babies in a bucket

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A duck walks into a bar and orders 2 beers and a shot. The bartender says "That'll be four fifty." The duck says he doesn't have any money and asks if the bartender can put it on his bill. The bartender says "No." He then picked the duck up by the neck and raped him mercilessly. "That's what he gets" one patron said. "Yeah, he was asking for it"

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whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? the pizza doesn't scream when it goes in the oven. By darragh Hamilton

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How the hell do you know? What are you Nero? You are completely right! I was going to say I got no blue tie, but then I forgot you often call ribbons for ties... How? Should I be scared? I am not, no wonder you never felt human... I am shocked, I cant think straight I am confused and... Sorry Nero, Goodnight, if nothing else, you are no demon, but rather an angel, sweet dreams love. The solvemedia says the bible, this is freaky, my mind is numb.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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