Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes You should probably get yourself checked.

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Why did the asian lady buy the large shirt instead of the medium? Because the medium didn't fit

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What's the difference between a trampoline and a dead baby? I take my cleats off when I jump on the trampoline

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Well You're Full Of It . -Full Of What ? Well , Probably Blood And Other Organs You Can't Live Without . .

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A: "Knock knock." B: "Who's there?" A: "John Doe." B: "John Doe who?" A: "..."

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Why is that man such a perv? I don't know. Ever since I let him see my boobs, he has had this undying obsession with sex. So, I guess that, as society would classify him, he is a sex addict. He will do anything for it, even if he needs a man to get it. I feel terrible about starting his obsession, and plan to take him to therapy next week for the sake of his health.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see monkey do. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the second monkey.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms

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One time, I called the police, but it was actually a fire. So my neighbors died.

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My friends a Jehovahs Witness. He got all pissed at me because he tried to tell me a knock knock joke and I ignored him.......i totally stole this joke lol.

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what do u call blue fluff? blue fluff

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so theres a plane, inside the plane are 500 solid bricks one falls out, how many are left? 499 What are the three steps to putting an elephant into a refrigirator? Open the fridge, put in the elephant, close the fridge. What are the four steps to putting a dear in the fridge? Open the fridge, take out the elephant, put in the deer and then shut the fridge. It's Simba's birthday, what animal isn't there? The deer. its still in the fridge. a lady is walking across a street, she suddenly falls to the ground why? Because the brick hit her in the face. (:

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Lewis

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A group of blondes rent a car and decide to drive to Disney World. Along the highway, they see a sign reading "Disney World left." They exit the highway, turn left, and enjoy their well-deserved vacation from practicing law.

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why did the little girl fall off the swing she had no arms

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CHAD'S A FAG!!!

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Why did the boy stay in the closet? Because the door was locked.

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Why couldn't Billy see the show? Because Billy is blind.

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What do you say to a black man in the morning? Good morning

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Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refridgerator

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How did Jimmy know that his neighbor was a serial killer? He didn't... Jimmy's dead now

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting yours asshole clawed by a grizzly

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for his birthday? A bike

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So a blonde walks into a wall...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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