A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The horse said nothing because it doesn't understand human language.

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What's red and smells like cherries. Cherries

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What do you call a black man backfilping off a roof The dark knight

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What sits on a shelf and says hey im a book? A person who thinks hes a book.

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the next time someone says "yolo" im going to pull out my shotgun and reply "sadly..."

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man returned and said, "My friend does not have a pulse and he is not breathing, so I stand by my prior assumption."

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what happened when the sports mascot ate a bean and cheese burrito? he shat inside his costume and got fired.

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A White guy invites his Black friends into his house, he says "Make yourself at home." THEY DO

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Why didn't Tyron run from the police? He had no legs.

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A black man walks into a bar full of white people. And then... He orders his drink.

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pudding

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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What did the spider say to the lobster? Nothing, they are enemies and don't live in the same habitat.

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someone jumped off a bridge he died

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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how do you get lady gaga to wake up in the morning? Hit her with a brick

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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Only steers and queers come from Texas and i dont see any horns on you so what does that mean? It means I am not a Minotaur.

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Roses are Red, Violets are not blue they are violet, nothing rhymes with this, I give up

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What happened when the Mexican lays his head on a pillow? He falls asleep

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Q: What do you call a Polish astronomer? A: Copernicus.

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Your wife died during the delivery.

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Roses were red Violets were blue Until the Fire nation attacked Now it's all black

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what's the diferance between a boner and a lambroghini? I dont have a lambroghini

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops