Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was drunk.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: Men are always very careful to have penises. Why don't women care enough to have them? A: That's a very good question.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do you stop a drunk driver? With a minivan and family of four.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Knock Knock Who’s there? Your son Your son who? Your son who’s sick of having a paranoid mother who won’t just open the door!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What happens if you punch a girl? An equal rights protest.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What happpens when a Jew walks into a wall with a boner? He breaks his nose

thumb_up thumb_down -4

I said no! Its not funny... Maybe a little but stop it, I am having trouble enough finding out which comments are mine as it is.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A man was walking home when a little boy ran up to him. He said "hey mister, how do you sleep apples?" Then the man wasn't sure why he asked him so he spelled it out for him "that's easy my boy, A-P-P-L-E" the little boy said "you said pee pee!" Then he laughed and ran off

thumb_up thumb_down -4

When life throws you lemons, duck.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Yo Momma is not fat.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why was Jimmy sad? Because he was about to be shot for attempting to assassinate the president.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why do bears go to school on Sunday's? They don't, bears don't go to school.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: What happens after you have sex with Michelle Obama? A: You wake up and kill yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What you call it when 8 goes over 4? An improper fraction.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the mother get upset with her son? Because he sexually experimented with his cousin.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

how did the little black boy cross the river? he walked over the bridge.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

antonio has a penis head.lol

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did little Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what is differnt about a boyscout and a jew? the boyscout comes back from camp

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Knock Knock Who's There? Im Black Im Black Who Open The Door Now Pancakes Granted

thumb_up thumb_down -4

I am paralyzed from the neck down.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops