A guy walked into a bar. He got drunk. He hit a small child with his Suburu and was charged with a DUI.

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A Jew, a Russian, and a Turk walk into a bar. The Jew asks, "Can I get a glass of Manischewitz?" The bartender serves him. The Russian asks, "Can I get a shot of vodka?" The bartender serves him. The Turk then asks, "Can I get a Turkish coffee?" The bartender looks at him, confused, and says, "Sorry, but this is a bar. Unfortunately we don't serve coffee."

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What did the White guy say to the balck guy? "How are you?"

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Roses are red My bulb is blue My pants are extending When I look at you

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You're a big fat monkey.

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Sometimes I sit in the bath and pretend im a bubble

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Why does it get hot after a basketball game? Because of the crowd all breathing out carbon dioxide and the high level of activity generating excess body heat.

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tea with milk?

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Why do the lesbians where pants? Because they are extremely comfourtable and the best for cold days

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You know what's natural? Bears.

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn

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He--Hey guys

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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People who are addicted to brake fluid just can't stop.

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Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by a giant elephant.

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What the corn in the core? The mexican antelope.

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Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

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Eight hours? Sigh, leave it to me then! We both know you are a sweetheart behind that thick skull of yours, I mean why would you ask if it bothers me then?

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You know what's stupid and gay? Idiots and homosexuals, respectively.

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Why are black people scared of chainsaws? Because the chainsaws go run nigga nigga run.

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Why did the blonde do at the WTC on 9/11? Die.

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Q: How do you make a clown stop laughing? A: Hit it in the face with an axe

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What's the easiest way to load dead babies into a tractor trailer? Pitchfork.

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Is your refridgerator running? because if its not, you should probably have it looked at by a repair man,

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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