How are a black man, a hispanic man, and a chinese man similar? Believe it or not they all love cantaloupe!

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why did the Mexican make a burrito for his grandma? it's her favorite food and she has artheritis and its to painful for her to stand long enough to make one herself.

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A panda walks into a bar and orders a beer and a hamburger. After he eats he stands up stretches and pulls out a gun shooting everyone in the room but the bartender. The panda puts $20 on the bar and turns to leave. As he walks out the door the bartender asks why the panda shot everyone. The panda tells him to look in the encyclopedia. The bartender looks up panda and he reads: "A rare bearlike mammal (Ailuropoda melanoleuca) of the mountains of China and Tibet, having woolly fur with distinctive black and white markings. Also called giant panda, panda bear." Seeing absolutely nothing in this description that would rationalize the homicides the panda had just committed, the bartender arrived at the reasonable conclusion that the panda was psychotic and having severe psychological problems which probably caused the incident. The bartender couldn't help but wonder if this tragedy could've been avoided had the panda been properly screened for schizophrenia and guns been properly secured in a safe at the panda's mother's house.

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Q) A Christian, slightly disabled but perfectly capable man has a packet of Jaffa Cakes. He strolls casually toward the edge of a cliff, rapidly checking his watch. The man slowly examins the packet before gradually opening the packaging. First the box, then the packet. He quickly throws the jaffa cakes over the edge of the cliff, Why? A) The man doesnt like jaffa cakes

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What smells like dead rats? Dead hamsters

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What's worse then getting socks on Christmas? Being murdered by a bear.

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What's black and white and enforces the rules at football games? A referee? Wow you're really smart.

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Your text.

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Why couldn't the boy hide his penis? Circumcision.

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Two dogs went out for a walk. Then their master took them home.

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Whats worse than one dead guy? 2 dead guys

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? Someone left the gate open.

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why did the black person cross the road to get to his lynched sister

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How many Bedouins do you need to change a light bulb? 2, one is changing the bulb and the second is powering the generator.

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I once had my heart broken by my first true love. I then died, she was convicted of murder and my family grieved over my death.

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What has 4 legs and doesn't move? A child born in Chernobyl.

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Rebecca Blacks walk into a bar. She gets shot.

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What's white and sticky? A white stick.

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A jew walks in the german bar, the jew is captured tortured, raped, and shot along with his entire family

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What happened to the lion which escaped from the zoo? It was successfully recaptured.

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Why did the plane crash? because there were two towers in front of it.

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Well that sucks, your dad is dead.

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A man walked into a bar, therefore beginning a lifetime of alcoholism that would slowly tear his family apart.

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What do you get when John pulls your toe off the waterfall and takes three from an caramel? -6 to the power of golf.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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