What does the lifeguard do on his free time? Ejaculate.

WWII veteran screamed! "You d@mn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

What do you call an attractive woman in a blender? A very rare occurrence.

Whats worse than cold feet? getting your feet chopped off.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have cancer, How 'bout you?

Knock Knock! Who's there? It's Jim. Jim who? I'm your son, Jim. Are you losing your memory?

-I thought the lesson had started? -It has

A deranged serial killer walks into a bar. No one leaves because he looks like a normal guy.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had celebral palsy.

Anthony sucks

So Helen Keller walks into a bar...

What do you call an Aboriginal in a yellow sleeping bag? An organised man, ready for the harsh winter ahead.

A man was standing out in the rain and calls out to god saying "smite me god, SMITE ME NOW" and the man was arrested and booked cause a near by neighbor reported on the disturbance. he is now facing charges of disturbing the peace.

roses are red violets are blue i need a pee and so do u

how did the black guy get into school? he walked thru the front door.

Y did the boy fall down the stairs???? He was In a wheel chair

What did the man on the moon say? Nothing. He died because his supply of oxygen ran out.

a guy on the street throws a boy between 2 priests

womens rights

How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? One second let me count them.

A man jumped off a bridge. He went bungee jumping with his family and had a great time.

Q: Who was the best Jewish cook? A: Hitler.

Why didn't the boy get his mom anything for her birthday? He was killed by a drunk driver years ago

i used to take arrows to the knee,til i took one to the balls.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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