What's the best way to win a race? Run faster than all other participants.

why did the Japanese father cry? because when america bombed japan in wwll it happened to kill the rest of his family

A dyslexic blind man walks into the bartender behind the bra

How do you annoy a farmer? Shoot his wife.

What did the caninibol do when he duped his girlfriend He wiped

How many Druggies does it take to make toast. One.

Want to hear a joke? Women's rights.

Q: What cat walks on two feet? A: Garfield Q: What mouse walks on two feet? A: Mickey Mouse Q: What duck walks on two feet? A: Donald Duck? A: No, all ducks you dipshit.

Why is the fat man fat? Because he has an extremly bad metabolism which makes him gain two pounds from eating one cheeseburger

Jimmy: I'm like hey, what's up, hello. Jon: I've already met you.

Elephants can jump higher than the tallest building. You know why? It's because buildings can't jump.

What did the raped girl get for Christmas? Pregnant.

why did the man jump out of the plane without a parachute? Im not really sure, maybe to commit a slow and painful suicide.

What's brown and smells like shit? Shit.

Why did the young boy drop his bus. He was hit by an ice cream.

Hey I just banged you, and it was crazy, delete my number, and keep the baby.

A manly man drives up in a yellow bug, What do the girls think? They think its very manly! (;

A man found out that he had hit the lottery and would be receiving 300 million dollars, but he had to fly to china to do so. The man took a plane to China from New York and would arrive within the next several hours. Meanwhile, in australia a god-cow was producing infinitely large amounts of concentrated milk. His milk was so infinitely large in mass that it collapsed on its own mass and turned into black hole; absorbing the entire Earth. The man never got to receive his money from winning the lottery

Yo momma's so black, when yo poppa rides her, he says "Look! I'm Hiccup!"

How do you scare a black man? Burn his house down.

What did the taxi friver say to the man? "You forgot your briefcase"

What did the rug say to the floor? I got you covered

Why is it funny when dogs talk ? Answer: they don't

What do you say when you see a flying donkey Wtf

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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