What the difference between a rabbit an a eagle? They both fly except for the rabbit

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Knock knock Who's there? You're You're who? YOU'RE MOM IN MY BED!!! (i know it sucks)

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You have 10 apples and 12 cabbages How many pizzas can you fit on the roof? Purple because aliens don't wear hats.

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An asian man walks into a bar He buys a drink.

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why am I who i am, and you are who you are? dick spice

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"New season of Dr.Phil. How does that make you feel?" ANGERY!!!!!

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What do you call a shark on land A dead shark

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What did Adam Sandler get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish.

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My uncle was involved in 9/11... He called me before the plane crashed into the twin towers, his final words were so comforting... "ALLAH AKBAR!!!"

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sarah!

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Q: What is soft, fuzzy, and lives in the woods? A: Yeti

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What do you say to a black man with AIDS? I hope you get medical help and find a cure for your illness.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

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A man walks into a bar and is promptly sent out because he is under the age of 21.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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why did Suzy play jump rope with the neighbors kids? She had no legs!

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A man walks into a bar, he purchases a drink from the barman proceeds to finish the drink and then leaves.

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Why did the little girl fall of the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Someone clearly messed up on naming the flower. Violet is synonymous with purple, Which is obviously NOT blue; It's the mixture between blue and red.

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knock knock Who's there? Will Nealis Will Nealis who? Will nealis continuously finds himself crying himself to sleep as reality begins to smack himn in the face revealing to him that nobody has, does, or ever will like him. He is also informed that the reason his parents left him is because he is such a flaming ginger, his nasty face ruins the atmosphere of any room he walks in to. he has been adopted by a lovely gay couple and he takes after both of his fathers very much, in the aspect of enjoying massive animal c o c k in his mouth as well as having threesomes with his dads. will goes to school everyday and is tormented for being homosexual, so when he goes home hie parents beat him....off and have lemon partys with wills grandpa as he watches and masturbates vigourously.

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Girl goes to see a sex therapist. Girl says, "Doc, though this has never been a problem, for the past 3 months I have been unable to reach climax. Can you help me?" Doc says, "Yes.". And after an intense 18 months of therapy the doctor helped the girl to discover that her inability to reach climax was related to issues of childhood sexual abuse. And after another 36 months of therapy the girl finally found the courage to confront and forgive her unrepentant abuser, as she realized that by not forgiving him, it was like drinking poison while hoping that he would die. And though the doctor did help her,as he had said, the girl never regained her ability to reach climax again.

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What did the lawyer name his daughter. he couldnt because both the baby and his wife died in child birth.

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I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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Q:What does a virgin and a penny both have in common? A:Guys don't want them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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