Sorry I am like so fucking wasted still, I keep giggling and laughing all of the time.

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What do you call a Fat man? You call him by His name because that's the polite thing to do.

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What do you call a black man riding a bicycle? A good citizen who cares about the environment.

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Why did the girl kill herself? she was depressed.

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What do you get when you cross an l with a line? A t.

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Why didn't the Irishman walk into the bar? Beacause he had killed himself the previous night as a result of his alcoholism.

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How did the fireman get the cat out the tree? He sprayed it with a hose, killing it in the process.

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What funny about AIDS nothing its a terrible disease

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What did the grape say when the elephant sat on it? Nothing, scientific research has shown over thousands of years that grapes cannot talk.

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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Why did the kid have no arms? A clown came and chopped them off.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Make hurtful and upsetting remarks about her person.

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A: Knock Knock B: Who's there? A: The Police. We have a warrant for your arrest.

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4 strangers are shopping at the mall. The big one does a trick and then the small one was good. The bad was small like a tree, seven days later the short one was having a party with a pretty lady. To the teacher was morning and everyone did happy times.

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Friends are like snow; they disappear when you pee on them.

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VAL SUCKS

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Q. Which one do you hate more? Jews, Mexicans, or Asians. A. I hate all of them, but jews are annoying when they resist getting stuffed in the oven.

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WHAT DYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE MEAN YE DON'T KNOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW?

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Q: Why did Susan fall off the swings? A: She had no arms Q: Why did no one help her up? A: She had no friends Q: why was she at the play ground? A: Her parents were fighting again Knock Knock Who's there? Not Susan

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what did the women with no arms and legs say to her daughter? go to your room.

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Two muffins are in an oven. And by muffins I mean jews. They both die a horrible death.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am adopted And so are you

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Roses are red violets are blue I am in 301 Club and so are you.

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Your mother has cupcakes, she offers you one, how many does she have left? The same amount she had before, you are full. Moral: Cupcakes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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