What do you call a black man with cancer? Someone with cancer

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How does Lady Gaga like her meat? As a dress.

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Knock knock! Who's there? F*ck. F*ck who? F*ck you.

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Welcome to Horsehead! 1. Our servers are derpy right now, do yourself a favor and never come back, oh yes they are gonna be derpy right then too! 2. THIS IS MY WORLD PEOPLE MYYYYY WOOOOOOOORLD!... ...Ps: My world sucks. 3. Antijokes 30000 per day, other stuff, Zero. (30000 by me) 4. You: People better like me because I dont like myself. Me: I like myself FUCK PEOPLE! FUCK YOU! (thats me on horsehead) welcome to die! 5. IRIS... IRIS! WHAT AM I TYPING FOOOOOOOOOOOOR!

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A morbidly overweight baby eats horse poop and dies a slow horrible death

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whats brown and sticky? whatever is coming from your pants

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Blond answers: Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat............?

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Have you ever seen the inside of Stevie Wonder's house? Neither has he.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Recycling anti-jokes

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Jimmy's mom: Jimmy go do your chores now!! Jimmy: You shut your mouth, whore. Get your smelly ass back in the kitchen!!!

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if you spell clever backwards you get a mixture of letters that don't make sense

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Jerry: Why arent you talking to me Seth? Seth then explains using sign language that he was born mute and is offended that Jerry keeps forgetting. Then Jerry uses sign language to say" **** off i have alzheimers!"

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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What do you call a blonde with a broken arm? A cripple.

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A woman leaves the kitchen.

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Okay so there was a turtle, a pig, and a donkey. They were out fishing when suddenly they spot a man in boat. The man said he hasn't eaten in 5 days and he is very hungry. He looked at the turtle and said "no, too much shell." The turtle was happy and left. He looked at the pig and said "no, too much fat." The pig ran away and was very happy. He looked at the donkey and said "I think I'll have donkey today." The donkey ran away because he was scared. The man died from hunger.

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who wants to hear a joke about the broken pencil? to late, its sharpened

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Roses are, blue, Violets are red, Screw poetic forms, I wish you were dead

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What did the Asian say to the Mexican working at the friutstand? Hi, I'm Asian!

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you know somebody is lying when it IS opposite day.

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What do you say to a friend named Alex? The Game

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What did the boy with no arms, no legs, and cancer get for his birthday? AIDS

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why did the guitar player cross the road? to play his gig

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Why was the man hit by the car? Hellen Keller was driving.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops