What happened to the orphan? Who cares?

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why is dog animal? it is not fish! 18 fits of has hair only have is Buddhist

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What do grass and cows have in common? They both say "moo" except for grass

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Your mom is so fat, that your gonna get a brother soon.

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Just got cancer: YOLO!! -sad face-

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Yo momma is so fat, that after boarding an airplane the flight crew respectfully asked her to deboard, as with her on board the plane would be exceeding the reccomended weight, and thus be unable to fly safely.

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I would tell you a joke but I'm not funny

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Roses are red Violets are blue You're parents are dead All your friends are too

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Q. What did the girl on drugs get for Easter? A. Down Syndromes Disease.

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What did the Cat get for Christmas? Nothing cats don't celebrate Christmas

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The Holocaust? What's worse than finding a worm in your apple.

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You know what happens when you assume? You make a judgment based on incomplete information.

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Why doesn't Santa Claus like cantaloupe? Because he doesn't exist. You have to exist to like cantaloupe.

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Q. why did the skeleton crosse the rood. A. he didin`t becas he had no guts

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Why did you fall? Because of my buttcrack.

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What do you call a giraffe driving a car? A danger to society.

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A women walks into a bar which is means she is pretty rich to be able to have a bar in her kitchen

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Have you heard about the hipster paleontologist? He liked dinosaurs better when they were underground.

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There once was a man from Kentuckit, who like to dissapear with his dog and clean up the shit using a plastic bag and put it in the allocated public bin.

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What did the sad orphan with liver cancer get for Christmas? Pictures of dead babies to put things in perspective.

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I can't believe it," the man exclaims, "I've died and gone to Heaven! I-" St. Peter interrupts him. "Not quite yet, my son. You must first answer three questions. You will only enter Heaven if I deem you fit to do so." The man nervously agrees. "All right. First question," St. Peter says. "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." "Splendid," St. Peter responds. "Did you attend church every Sunday?" The man loses some of his former confidence. "I may have missed the odd week." "That's fine," says St. Peter. "One last question... Do you believe you are worthy of entering the Gates of Heaven?" The man answers nervously, "Well... yes, yes I do." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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a black man and a white man walk into a job interview. neither of them get the job due to lack of skill in the field.

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How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a sloth? Everything. The blonde is a human being and humans are way different than sloths.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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