Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Being caught by the store manager, arrested, convicted, and thrown into jail for petty theft and then getting anally raped for the next 3 months all because you wanted to check an apple without paying for it.

Knock knock. Who's there? Justin. Hello Justin, please come in.

Weebles wobble, but paralyzed kids fall down.

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

A man walks into a bar and approaches a man "Ask me if I'm a tree." "Fine.Are you a tree?" "No."

What did the boy call the man that kicked the cat? "Sad twat"

What did the mute boy get for his birthday? i dont know he didnt tell me

What is the difference between an anti-joke and a joke? The word anti before anti-joke.

Why did Sally drop her Ice Cream Cone? Because her dog licked her butthole.

A rapist, black guy, and a homophob walk into a bar and the bartender says nice game last night kobe.

Q. want to hear a really funny joke? A. Fred Figglie-horn

Next up, Sharpi and Ryan take their audition faliure very seriously in "columbine high school musical"

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. Except when I said muffins I meant Jews. .. I guess it really isn't that funny anymore.

what happens when an unstoppable force hits an unmovable object? it goes around.

I'm trying to find out how many people in the world have Alzheimers, do you? No. Bananas.

Roses are red Violets are blue You're parents are dead All your friends are too

why did the baby start crying? because he was very hungry and hadn't been feed all day

What song does a bulimic person sing while on the toilet? Nothing Bulimic people don't poop.

Why do people poke people on facebook? Because they have no friends and will die alone

Why was little Bobby Smith crying on Christmas day? Because the doctor diagnosed him with terminal cancer.

Why can't Vampires go out in the sunlight? Because they don't exist.

whats worse than worldwarII world war iii

A group of 8 paintbal professionals land on an island to battle another paintball team. The team is then faced by a challeng of the other team ambushing them. Everyone is okay and not touched. A case breaks the window of the bus they hide in. They open the case and find a bullet proof vest. A man placed the vest on himself. They made it one by one out of the bus and to the otherside of the field the man with the vest was shot and started going... eghegeheghdjrhherbehgh and they pulled out a real gun bulet. They were now under attack by an enemy with real amunation. Then next man to run across the fied was killed. Tehy ran fr their lives.

what did little johnny scream at the xbox after he lost a game? god what the hell! Muskcrat143 i told u to cover my back when i had my predator missile! now my covers blown and i lost my killstreak! god u suck so much and Hippo099 why didn't u kill them before they got a killstreak like wtf!!! i told u to use ur semtex cause i had a claymore set down jeez u guys suck i'm leaving.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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