Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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What's more dangerous, a big rock or a small one? It doesn't matter. You can blame my mom for having me.

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What's the difference between a car tyre and 365 used condoms? One is a Goodyear. The others a fucking great year!!! San2

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Why was the boy sad? Because he looked behind him and saw a pedophile penis in his ass.

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Your mom is so nce that when you got into college she taught you to be more independent so you could succeed later in life.

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A black man is picking cotton in a southern white mans field. This is because the white man is paying a more than fair wage and the black man is a 3rd generation cotton picker who enjoys taking part in his heritage.

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(Guys I want to get the most likes so like my joke.) What did the person want. To get the most likes :)

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Scumbag steve walks into his friend's dorm room, and finds out he has epilepsy. He then flicks the lights on and off really fast

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why did the chinken cross the rode? why? to get to the gay persons house. Knock, Knock. Who's there. the chicken.

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Why was the boy adopted........ because hes grandad

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what did the tree say to the other tree? Don't leaf me!

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Q: On a plane, a black man does not grab a bag of peanuts, while everyone else does. Why? A: He has allergies.

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What did the fork say to the spoon? I have tongs and you don't. Ha.

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A man walked into a bar. He was treated at the local hospital with a minor contusion.

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People who do not realize the concept of this website, and write real jokes on it.

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No one walks into a bar The bar is slowly losing business and will soon be forclosed upon and will also lose his home as a result causing his family and himself to be homeless and slowly suffer on the streets

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Why did the pig jump over the farmer? Because he's a stupid idiot.

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Why do you put babies in the blender feet first? To hear them scream.

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A Muslim walked into a bar. He didn't drink anything

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Justin Bieber's gay!! My butt is sexier!(;

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Tell me fuck you Fuck you No fuck your mum

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Q: What happened to the dog when he eat the banana? A: he got raped by a monkey...

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Take one: "What kind of assho... Take two "What kind of awesome people with no dignit..." Take three: "What kind of awesome people with most dignified self image would use this piece of shit s... Final take What kind of awesome people with most dinified self image would use this RETARDED PIECE OF MOLTEN SHlT SITE FROM FUCKING HELL?" Moral: "Technically I do not use it, I abuse it just like I did your mom... Hey, I am your dad by the way, that gives me the right to rape you whenever I want" NeroMetal I once fisted a velociraptor to death (I do not mean punching it in the face here if you think thats something), but that's not metal... I cant for the fuck bother to find out how to spell the fucking dinosaurs name... Now that is metal...

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Whats Worse that 10 babies stapled to 1 tree? 1 Baby stapled to 10 trees

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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