How many licks did it take for the owl to get to the center of the tootsie roll tootsie pop? A: Since when did owls have tounges?

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The Dali Lama walks into a pizza parlor and asks the owner to make him one with everything. After 20 minutes or so the owner brings the Dali Lama a pizza with every available topping. After he finished eating the Dali Lama thanked the owner and left a nice tip.

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wommmoaooammaaa

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Why is Megan Fox so hot? Because the air conditioning broke.

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Cornelius went to the dcotor and got a sticker and a lollipop for being a good patient. He later went home and shoved the lollipop stick up his dick hole and started wildly masturbating. I forgot to mention Cornelius was 42 years old.

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Why did the deer cross the road? To cause the car crash that killed my father when i was just 15 years old.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because there were no cars coming and it seemed like a safe time to cross

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Why did the man yell? Cause he wanted to!

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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If humans say YOLO what do cats say? meow.

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A horse walks into a bar, prompting the show-jumping judges to subtract points for failing to clear the obstacle.

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Why did lisa fall of her bike? Because her dad threw a refrigerator at her. -JCB

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I don't have ADHD I just- Hey look a squirrel!

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Whats worse than seeing your family killed in front of your eyes? Not much to be honest

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Yo mama so ugly, she has to work harder than most women to attract men.

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What's the cure of cancer? Death.

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How does a Welshman take a shit? Like anyone other human being does.

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what do you call a bunch of black people running down a hill Exercise

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An alphabet walks into the post office and asks for a letter. What does the postal worker give the alphabet? Nothing. Alphabets can't walk.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Columbine Massacre

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what do you say to the preacher when he walks into church? i dont fu***** know, im jewish.

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aa

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How dou you find the population of mexico? Take a census....... By throwing a dime in the street!

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what did the addidas sign say to the nike sign? I'm all in

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops