So two Penn State administrators walk into a butt.

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A Frenchman, an Irishman, and a Russian walk into a bar. The Frenchman orders a glass of wine, the Irishman orders a whisky, and the Russian, who prefers to be sober, orders a glass of water. They have an all-around pleasant night, yet they leave the bar upset. Why? A severe water contamination in the town resulted in the Russian man consuming a fatal dose of arsenic.

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Oh my God! A talking dog!

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Your momma is so dumb, she failed the IQ test.

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Help, this is an urgent message from the S.S. Obesity. We're sinking; I can't imagine why.

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Why was the little girl crying? She got raped by a giant scorpion.

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One dog says to the other dog "Nice day, isn't it?" The other dog says "You can talk!?"

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wat does say to another bird....... chirp chirp

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Whats blue and fuzzy? Blue fuzz. Whats pink and fuzzy? Blue fuzz that's embarrassed.

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Knock knock (who's there) Orange ( orange who) orange you glad to see

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind.

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Knock knock whos there Ewan Gudgeon *Shoots Himself cause cannot live with hearing tht name*

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Guy 1: "Smells like UpDog in here." Guy 2: "No it doesnt.."

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Church.

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I went to Nebraska and saw a dead squirrel

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What did the old man say to kid who was begging to his mommy? Shut up.

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How did leatherface cut a tree when he lost his chainsaw? He just asked a friendly neighbor to borrow him a axe

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Why isn;t the square root of peanut butter very athletic?.Actually, peanut butter isn't a mathematical equation nor does it have the necessary chemical make-up, physical properties or the biological construct that is required for it to be able to be considered athletic, stupid. You now have a inoperable tumor at the base of your spine. And I fucked your dad and shat in his mouth. Also, the cure for leukemia is my diarrhoea, you faggot.

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What's brown and sticky? Shit.

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Happy Birthday!! Have some meth cupcakes.

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What did the blonde call her pet zebra? Isaac

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Why are blondes so dumb? They aren't dumb they just have prejudice against them

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Somebody pushed it.

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I literally died laughing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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