Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have Dementia Pickles

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What do bicycles and platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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Why did billy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him.

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What did the boy say to his dad when he realized he was gay? Dad, I'm gay.

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Why did the man have square fingers? Because he has Apert Syndrome

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Whats black and white and eats like horse? A zebra.

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What's 9 + 10 19

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You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

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What did one liar say to the other liar? I'm very honest.

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What makes men cry? The realization that humanity is completely pointless in the infinitely expanding universe and thus any action to try and improve human life is also a complete farce.

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What's faster a hungry black guy or a car? A car

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What did the rabbit say to the man nothing animals cant talk

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Why did the blond check your phone? AIDS

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What did michael jackson say to the boys he touched? Nothing. Hes dead

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

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What did the angry man with tourette syndrome say when he smashed his thumb with a hammer? Ouch.

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Why did the little boy tell his classmates jokes? To try and fit in for once.

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Why was Timmy late for class? He got hit by a bus. Why was Jimmy late for class? He saw Timmy lying in the middle of the street, went out to help and got hit by another bus.

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What do you call a black priest? "Father" if you are Christian.

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Me: Hey frank, wanna die? Frank: No, why? Me: (Kills Frank) Frank: Dude why did you kill Frank?

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Why was the black man tangled in chains at the bottom of the ocean? Because he was a highly skilled diver and environmentalist who tragically entangled himself and consequently died slowly and painfully of suffocation while trying to save a whale from eating waste metal.

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A Frenchman, an Irishman, and a Russian walk into a bar. The Frenchman orders a glass of wine, the Irishman orders a whisky, and the Russian, who prefers to be sober, orders a glass of water. They have an all-around pleasant night, yet they leave the bar upset. Why? A severe water contamination in the town resulted in the Russian man consuming a fatal dose of arsenic.

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An American, a Canadian, and a Scottish man died in a horrible car accident. Their story was used as a lesson to keep teenagers from drunk driving.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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