What do you call a person with disabilities? Names.

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I'm so hungry I could eat a horse and chase the jockey.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I need a job Stop spitting on me

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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How do you change you dishwasher into a snowblower? Give her a shovel.

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Two hippies walk into a bar. They are both asked to leave because they are in violation of the 'no shoes, no service' policy.

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Why did the vegetarian eat a steak? Because he was not a vegetarian

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Why couldn't the dead man take a shit? He was severely constipated

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue.... I hate your guts.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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knock knock who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's alzheimers has progressed to the point where she no longer remembers him.

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The Moon Landing.

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What happened to the orphan? Who cares?

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why didn't the baby come to daycare? Because his mother got killed by spongebob

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Why couldn't billy hear his mom on the phone? Because Billy is deaf.

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Q: How did Helen Keller cross the street? A: She walked.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was running away from KFC.

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--- ___________________--- Can you tell what it is? Yes... Then what is it? Its a blanket,duh! ......

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A man walks into a bar. There were no survivors.

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so i was F***in this guy the other day with my penis.....shit! i mean i was F***in this girl and i jizzed

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One time at band camp.............tha'ts it........

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The Dali Lama walks into a pizza parlor and asks the owner to make him one with everything. After 20 minutes or so the owner brings the Dali Lama a pizza with every available topping. After he finished eating the Dali Lama thanked the owner and left a nice tip.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops