Q: How do you make a clown frown? A: Hit it with an ax.

Quack Quack Quack Quack Quack Quack Pi pi pi pi Pi pi pi pi Pingu Pingu!

What can be said about a high school drop out who is 30, lives with his mom, and plays WoW all day? He is probably a very high level mage

whats worse than 100 babies strapped to an atomic bomb? 1 baby strapped to 100 atomic bombs

Knock knock, Who's there? The police, you have committed 14 major felonies and you are being arrested.

Why did 4 Christians, 2 Jews, 1 Muslim, 1 Buddhist and an atheist squeeze into a Honda Accord? One of their co-workers at Appleby's made a compelling case for the financial and environmental benefits of carpooling.

Two pies where sitting in a oven when one of the pies says: God damn it's hot in here. The other pie screams out loud: HOLY SHIT A TALKING PIE!

Q.Why did the boy fail to complete his homework? A. He was a loaf of bread

You wanna hear a clean joke? Mary takes a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is a man.

A Jew, a Muslim, and a black guy board a plane. Who gets kicked off first? The jew for his unruly behavior towards the flight attendant.

why was six afraid of seven? seven was a sex offender

What starts with an 's' and ends with a 'hit'? Shortly after the war, 4 men went to celebrate at the local bar. They all had a grand time there, when a man in black walked into the bar. The man in black knocks once on the bar. "What do you want?" asked the bartender. The man in black didn't respond. This time, the bartender asked again, only louder. The man in black then turned to his right to face the 4 other men celebrating. The man in black then suddenly pulled out a pistol, and shot the 4th man. He then burst into a sprint and ran out of the bar. "He's hit," the 3rd man shouted, "he's hit!"

Johnny tried talking to his dog, there was no response.

What's harder than winning an argument with a woman. Lonsdaleite which has recently been declared the hardest substance known to man, and can withstand 58% more stress than the hardest diamond crystal.

A snail walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "hey we don't serve snails here," and flicks him across the street. 3 years later the snails walks back into the bar and said, "why'd ya do that for??"

ok guys finish this joke: Im the biggest fag-got because_____________.

Q: What do you call justin bieber? A: gay

A Jew walks into a bar screaming cause he just broke his face

Why was little Timmy afraid of his dentist? Because he was 10 foot scorpion.

i died. new product by steve jobs

A bear walks into a bar and kills every one

Q: Why is Alzheimer not funny? A: To get to the other side.

What is the difference between a rabbit and a plum? A: They are both purple, except for the rabbit!

your mama so fat she has a low self esteem

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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