Oh please! Come on! Those that got to us where mostly Russians remember? And what where my parents? (if you do not know you might have guessed it by now) I found a guy that looked about the same as me, messed him up and put my jacket on him, I do not die that easily. Anyway, id explain more, but I have been without these fucking painkillers so long that I am talking trash on this stupid site again... Seriously the pain I am used to, but this addiction on painkillers is a bitch... (shedog if censor got a hold on it) But it turns out I cant sleep without them, sleep just does not come anymore, so Ill go get some now. Who are you by the way? I am Nero7, Aka Axel Knight.

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What's black and white and read all over? Half a zebra.

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When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.

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Your mom is so fat that when she wears a yellow raincoat outside, people notice a rather large woman who is enjoying the weather and wearing a yellow raincoat.

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Why do dragons shoot fire? I don't know, I'm asking you the question.

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whats big and green, andif it falls from a tree , it can kill you? a golfcourse

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roses are red violets are blue i'll be back in an hour or two

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A man walks into me and I say: "WATCH IT PUNK!"

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Knock Knock .... Knock Knock .... Pum Pum Pum .... LAPD! open the door!

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When life gives you lemons you squirt them in someones eyes and steal what life gave them.

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Q: What do you call a dad running down a hill? A: A mom running down a hill, I lied about the dad.

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knock knock who's there? the police, we have a warrant for your arrest.

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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Why was the prostitute unsuccessful? because she had no vagina

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Knock knock Who's there? What are you, blind?

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Wat do u call a priests shit Holy shit

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What do shoes and boxes have in common Both will get squashed if a washing machine lands on one of them

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get hit by a car and die.

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Why did the blonde flunk out of school? Because she was a fucking idiot.

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Haikus are easy But they don't always make sense. Refrigerator.

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How many christians does it take to change a light bulb? No one knows, by the time they finish unscrewing the burned out light, a hi-jacked plane crashes into them.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because she wasn't a woman

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What did the Icelandic man say to the Norwegian man? Vishtok yerder poten hash vil narsh varden.

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Q: What's black and white and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops