roses are red violets are blue i have aids and so do you happy valentines day!

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What's worse than waking up with a hangover? Not waking up at all

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why couldnt the man run because he had no legs

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DON'T TOUCH MY DUCK, IT HAS A ONE DOLLAR BILL

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I need to start studying.

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What do you call a deaf-black man that professionally generates maps of the world? A cartographer.

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Why did the blonde jump over the glass wall? To see what was on the other side.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Orange is orange

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Q: What did the black man, the white man, the hispanic man, and the english man have in common? A: They all enjoyed broccoli.

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What's the difference between a educated black man & a educated white man? One's black, One's white

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Where do cows go on the weekends? The slaughterhouse.

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What's the deal with airline food? Nothin. It's quite scrumcious.

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whats the diffrence 2 gay people and 1 gay person? A 1 person diffrence

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A mosquito flies into a bar and orders a bloody mary, the bartender then takes out a swatter and kills the pest. Noticing the event, the patrons cheer and continued drinking their frothy beverage. Minutes later, the phone rings and the bartender answers the phone. "Hello?" "Hi, I'm looking for a friend of mine, is he there?" "Let me check, by the way, what's his name?" "Jack Hoff" "One sec. HEY FELLAS(yelling over the noisy bar), IS THERE A JACK HOFF HERE? I NEED A JACK HOFF! ANYONE?" Mr. Hoff, sitting at the bar hears this and asks, "who is it?" "He said he's a friend of yours!" "Which one?" " He said his name's Dick Stroker and he needs help on something hardhe'll meet you around back." "Oh ok, thanks."

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a man walks into a bar he has a few drinks and announces to his friends that hes driving home, dave (one of his friends) tells him that its a bad idea and takes his keys off of him until the next day.

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How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? None, you don't have to be jewish to change a light bulb

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A shocking example of the cruelty suffered by animals at hands of humanity.

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- Knock Knock!! - whos there? - KGB - KGB wh........... *slap* - vwe vwill ask the questions!!!!!!! - Knock Knock!! - whos there? - KGB - Mom the KGB is here again....... - i dont care just answer the damn door - 5 seconds later nobody answers the door....... u here a crash and all of a sudden big men run in with guns - one comes over and slaps the mother while he continues to say " the KGB vwill vwait for no one!!!!!" - every body in the house is shot and and the KGB goees on to tlive normal lives........ for the KGB

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knock knock whos there boo boo who? stop crying its only me! its not you, my mom has cancer, my dad was killed in a car accident, my pregnant wife has been murdered, and my uncle touches me.

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That awkward momment when there is no Candy in the Van... <3

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Hold on. Let me think of an answer.

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why was 7 afraid of 6?that is impossible it is older than six and stronger than its mother

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Why was Little Billy crying? He had cancer. Why was Little Sally crying? Little Billy's cancer was contagious.

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Why did the boy want to sleep in the same bed as his parents? His bedroom was on fire.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops