womens rights

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the horse walks into the bar the bartender calls the pet control

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MR MR WHO?? MR MC CANN

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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what happend when the little boy went on the rollercoaster ? It crashed.

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What did the gay guy say to the other gay guy Want to make out?

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I hated the Reading festival, i'm dyslexic. I hated it because my family died in a housefire while I was there.

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10+10=20. 20+20=40 40-10=30 I have 2 penises.

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wats green, fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree, it would kill u? a pool table

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What did Hitler say when he was dying? He said, "I'm dying."

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? A teenage girl was texting and driving, didn't see it, and now it's roadkill.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Umm... Why would it not?

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guess what the clown said to the kid... im a clown

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Why did Sheryl Go to the Bathroom? Cause she had Direha...........

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Q: Why did the Mexican mother leave her baby in the hot car during summer? A: Because she was irresponsible and forgetful.

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What did the monk say to the 1 legged, Asian prostitute Nothing, Monks take a vow of silence.

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guess what im a bitch i have no balls and i can slap your mum in the face

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Is it a bird, is it a plane?! No it's.... It's a bird.

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How many turrets patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? Cocksucker!!

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What is the meaning of life? Definitions of life on the Web: a characteristic state or mode of living; "social life"; "city life"; "real life" the experience of being alive; the course of human events and activities; "he could no longer cope with the complexities of life" the course of existence of an individual; the actions and events that occur in living; "he hoped for a new life in Australia"; "he wanted to live his own life without interference from others" animation: the condition of living or the state of being alive; "while there's life there's hope"; "life depends on many chemical and physical processes" the period during which something is functional (as between birth and death); "the battery had a short life"; "he lived a long and happy life" the period between birth and the present time; "I have known him all his life" the period from the present until death; "he appointed himself emperor for life" a living person; "his heroism saved a life" liveliness: animation and energy in action or expression; "it was a heavy play and the actors tried in vain to give life to it" living things collectively; "the oceans are teeming with life" the organic phenomenon that distinguishes living organisms from nonliving ones; "there is no life on the moon" biography: an account of the series of events making up a person's life a motive for living; "pottery was his life"

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If Chuck Norris has $5 and you have $5... that's $10.

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Why did the lorry cross the road? It was swerving to avoid a small child. Unfortunately the driver's reactions were too slow and he hit the kid. After a week fighting for their life in hospital the child fibaly died. There wasn't a scratch on the lorry though.

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Three french men are in the car wearing sombreros. They're trying to get to Disney World.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops