Q: How many babies does it take to paint a room? A: Depends on how hard you can throw.

If life gives you melons, you're probably dyslexic.

Studies show that 95% of house fires are caused by fire.

What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Names.

Johnny: One day dad i will be tall like you! (Later that day johnny was found dead in a garbage bag)

Q: What's black and white and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

your momma eats so much ice cream, you often find yourself without anything sweet to eat late at night when you're hungry

What's faster than a black man with a TV? olympic sprinters, cyclists, street legal cars, speed boats, helicopters, commercial airliners, bullets, fighters jets, missiles, SR-71, space shuttles, rocket ships, anything in orbit, excited electrons, and quite a lot more, actually.

Bitch

What do you call a mexican working at Taco Bell? An intelligent young man who recently graduated from high school, but due to his family's lack of money, he cannot pay for college, which is one of the reason's why he is working. He also needs money becuase he has a child on the way, due to his poor choice of not using protection while having intoxicated relations with his girlfriend. I wish him the best of luck!

What do you get when you combine lemons, sugar and water? Lemons, sugar, and water

Once ther was a happy little boy and he was just playing with his dinosaur when he was hit by the school bus that was supposed to take him to school. The End

A man walks into a Norfolk pub. The landlord (not being very worldly) notices he is of Middle Eastern descent and asks "are you Bin Laden"? To this the man replies "No I bin Swaffham". (Needs to be said in Norfolk accent)

Q: Why is Abu Soooo Dank? A: Because he scores too many left-foot bangers

What? Why?

who has moral fiber? a cerial killer

Whats the difference between a bench and a black man? A bench is an inanimate object incapable of speech, emotion, or thought process.

How to condom style ! Ayyyyyyy thts ur baby ! No! No! No! No! No! No! Broken condom style ;)

Q: What do you call men at sea? A: Sailors

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eyepatch? names.....

Why did god make asians? I dont know. Yah, me niether

What's the difference between a jew and pizza? A Jew is human and pizza is food.

Why don't aliens eat clowns? Because the paint used on their faces makes the extra terrestrials leery of lead poisoning.

wanna hear a sad joke? you! by mad james

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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