The boy wakes up and says "I'm feeling kind of fishy today." The dad come into the sea anemone and says that's because you are, Nemo.

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You can tell I have many friends because I got them to like this.

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Y

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What do you get when you cross drugs with a bathtub? Whitney Houston's worst nightmare

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Roses are black Violets are too I am a dog I don't know how to rhyme

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Q: What's the hardest part about throwing a baby down the stairs? A: My dick.

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-Whats not funny and has wheels? >What? -The Holocaust... I was lying about the wheels

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what did the kid with no arms and no legs get for x-mas a bike

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How do you get a one armed clown out of a tree? Hit it in the face with an axe.

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-What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew -The pizza doesn't experience many years of hardship and social belittlement at the hands of a dictator in need of a scapegoat to support radical ideas.

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what do you call a black man on a killing spree? whatever his xbox live gamertag is. that would probably be most appropriate

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Some chocolate and a new DVD.

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Yo mamas so greasy that she has a beard

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How many Spanish people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Uno

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What happens when you park a new Cadillac with a roll of $100 dollar bills on the dashboard in a black neighborhod? Many residents of that peaceful community will briefly glance at it and admire the wealth of the automobile's owner.

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how much will u suck my dick for? $100, $50, $25, o u said none so u give freebees!!!!

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Why is josh such a retard Because when he was born a brick fell on his head.

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two people are falling out of a plane, a blond and a brunnete who hit the ground first. the blond, the brunnete brought a parachute

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How many men do you have to have sex with to show that you're gay? But, I'm a woman!

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I was bitter, nonetheleast because you and I became friends, while someone working for you (at that time it might just as well had been you) was conducting a lot of illegal activities. I kept thinking, why does the guy call himself "the wizard", its the most used name... Why? Because it is the most used name, good luck finding "THE WIZARD" among internet nerds, but then again, if you search for the most famous one, you find "THE MAN", Not only did you tell me at first that you where Nero. Which I can prove you are not, but you know, one side of me was your friend, the other knew I would have to get rid of you no matter the cost, if you kept your activities. SImply put: When I enjoyed our time together, I pushed you away with stupid humor, small insults and etc, mostly in order to protect myself from getting to close with a potential threat for well, security, lets keep it at that.

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Whoever just posted that suicide shit is stupid, you can get arrested for that shit. I would delete it.

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101 ways to annoy people 1.) lying about having a 101 ways to annoy people

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What noise annoys a noisy oyster? Hispanics with their loud car stereos.

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Nero, please pick up the phone, I wont ever do that, it was a mistake okay? Stop that, my sister wont ever! My mom whatever! But if you lie a finger on my sister, I will kill you, I am at the outside, which room are you at? Tell me you coward fucker! Tell me!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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