Whats worse than burning your foot? Getting it eaten off by a cannibal.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because of excess velocity.

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Safe sex MR

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1

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._____________________. Whale!

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Have a nice day! Dont tell me what to do.

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Adam Chebali has no life

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Why was the ginger angry with the manager of the hardware store? His smoke detector didn’t come with a snooze button.

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I am aware that my positivity makes me do some bad mistakes, but if negativity is the alternative I will keep taking my chances.

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Hollywood presents: In a world... Where darkness and crime is at every corner... The governments darkest secret... MUST... BE... UNLEASHED! Jack Kirby: So, with this technology I can swallow criminals and gain their abilities? But is there not a lot wrong with this? Hollywood: Meh... Sorry, we are gonna go with The Fast and The Furious 64: Mario Kart style.

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How many lollipops does it take to shingle a dog? Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

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why were the African, Asian and Mexican men thrown out of the bar the barman was a racist

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I saw GESUS and SHE's BLACK

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Friends are like potatoes - when you eat them they die.

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Your mother is so stupid that she claimed the pole ran into her.

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Why is there no aspirin in the jungle? Because aspirin is a man-made drug derived from salicylic acid, and it it is this that is extracted from willow bark, which used to be used by Cherokee Americans as a fever-reducer and pain-reliever.

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-knock knock -i'm not at home, go away!

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Why did the black 10 year old miss school? Because his grandmother just had a severe heart attack and the whole family is coming in to visit and pay their last respects.

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Isn't a coincidence that the signing of the Declaration of Independence and the 4th of July are on the same day? Weird

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what do you call a woman who has sex for money? smart.

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Why doesn't Michael sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

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Knock Knock Whos there? Me. I am a psycopathic heroin addict, and i came to your house to violently rape you and kill your whole family. I dont have a family. Oh.

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Vegeta, What does the scouter say about his power level? It's Over 9000!!!!!

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Why did one sausage become scared of the other sausage? The first Sausage said " Hello " and the second Sausage said " OMG a talking sausage!!!" ...Jk sausages dont talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops