I woke up in bed with someone this morning. I forget why this is a joke, but your mother is a whore.

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Your Momma is sooooo poor, she struggles day by day to feed you and your 8 siblings while keeping a roof over your head.

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Whats louder than a dinosaur? 2 Dinosaurs

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Whats the difference between a Cadillac and 100 dead babies? I don't have a Cadillac in my garage.

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how did Andrew meet adele He was working as a stableboy

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Why did the dog get arrested? He didn't the people responsible for causing the dog fight got arrested for animal abuse.

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Why did the bartender refuse to let the black man in ? Because the bar was about to close.

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how do you get lady gaga to wake up in the morning? Hit her with a brick

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see monkey do. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the second monkey.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, It's still in its pen.

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A man was driving and texting at the same time and when he was not looking a car passed him on the other side of the road. The man driving the car that passed the man was talking on the phone. When the man txting looked up and look back and said thank god thats not me talking i could of crashed if i was him

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How do you stop an asshole from being an asshole toward you? Shoot him in the head.

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What do you call a black priest? HOLY SHIT!!!!

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Your wife died during the delivery.

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Little goldy locks was walking through a forest and stumbled across a nice cabin. She went inside and ate some newly made porridge and slept on the various beds that were there. The owners of the house came back from a stroll of their own and sued her for breaking and entering.

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A player under the tag "KiTcHeNGuRLxGaMerZ143" got a message after finishing a map on call of duty. "lol ur good."

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What's long and hard on a black man? Second Grade

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A Horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks the horse, "Why the long face?". The horse didn't understand English, so he took a shit on the floor, and left.

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Why is Kim Jong Un so horrible? I forgot the rest of the joke but your mum is a whore

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Joesph Triphook.

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What do you call a horse that likes to box? A horse

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A boy with cancer decides to go skydiving for his 18th bithday. Unfortunately, his parchute doesn't work & he dies before he hits the ground.

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A chicken decides to cross a road. Unfortunately it gets ran over and does. The end.

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a man is running away

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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