What do friends and potatoes have in common? If you eat them, they will die.

Knock knock Who's there? Prosti Prosti who? Prostitute

How do you wake Lady Gaga up? You poke-er--face....pokerface.

What time will the little girl get up for school? Never, she died in her sleep.

I am so good at sleeping, I can do it with my eyes closed.

Man #1: What was the hardest part about watching that kid get hit by that bus? Man #2: My dick...

Q: What do you call a black man's dead bodie? A: A corpse.

What's white and black and lives in the ghetto : a panda bear

Whats worse than being a black guy? NOTHING.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. It was a footless chicken.

Robin get in the batmobile!

Q: Why was 6 afraid of 7? A: He wasn't, it turns out 7 was afraid of 6 because 6 beat 7 up in high school

Q:What's funny about a Jew marrying a Nazi? A:The situation

What does Obama, the President of the United States of America see when he closes his eyes? His eyelids

What do you get when you cross a hooker with five shots of tequila? Herpes

Why didn't the teenager go to high school? He was murdered

Knock Knock.. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Daves dead. This is Darrell.

What do you call a man with no legs and no arms on your doorstep? Matt

Why did the man staple his own scrotum to his left thigh? He didn't. His friends did.

so a boy walks into a bar he was underage and escorted out.

Q. What is the answer to life the universe and everything A. 42

Why did Lucy have blond hair? Answer: Because both her parents had recessive hair traits.

whats super and the champions of europe? Leeds United

how much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? 7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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