A duck and a chicken walk into a bar. How improbable.

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Why did the chicken contact Michael Jackson? To get to the other side.

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why couldn't the man play frisbee? he was a dog

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Knock Knock Whos there? John John Who Tic Tic BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMM

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What is Osama Bin Laden's favourite colour? Doesn't matter. He's dead.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. my Mom is a hooker.

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Yo momma's so ugly. Most people do not enjoy looking at her

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Why do girls like Justin Beiber? They dont

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What goes in dry and comes out wet and sticky? Bubble Gum

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There are two kids playing basketball outside one kid shoots and makes it. The other youngster exclaims "nice shot!" because the other boy put the ball in the hoop from a very long distance.

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Why do you stick a baby in a blender feet first? So you can see the expression on its face...

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Oh, And one of them has a penis.

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Q: what do u call a hotdog that's not cooked? A:a raw hot dog

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What did the angry man with tourette syndrome say when he smashed his thumb with a hammer? Ouch.

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What did the guy say when he came out of the closet? Where's my green shirt?

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-Knock, Knock -Who's there? -Carl -Carl wh-wait... carl...CARL OH MY GOD!!!! WE ALL THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD ,CARL!!!! Where have you been? Oh my god... Mom's DEAD! When we all thought you were dead she hung herself! IT'S YOUR FAULT SHE'S DEAD, CARL! YOUR FAULT!!!!!! YOU ARE AN UNGRATEFUL PIECE OF SHIT CARL! YOU KNOW THAT? I hope you burn in hell.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because lately the posts on "anti-joke.com" have not been anti-jokes. Not even a little.

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Why are kenyans so fast? Because due to evolutionary changes, people from that area of the world have evolved to have superior muscle builds to sprint, hence giving them a natural advantage against an equally trained athlete form another part of the world with an equal skill level

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My name is Nero, Angelo Nero, its Italian (or rather Roman) For Black Angel, and yes it is my real name, you will believe me once you see my passport, driving license, mastercard whatever, I am 32 years old and I wont tell you my last name because at this rate... You could probably just google me up and find it yourself. Seriously, I am latino you know that, romantic is in my veins, but hey, you never told me you liked that so if we agreed to sex, that was what I was going with... I did tell you that sex is kinda meh for me without the romance factor. The thing about your name being Tifa, is that you look A LOT like the video game character, I mean come on! You even got red eyes! (okay hers may be a brownish red but come on!) You should post a picture of yourself online and see how many guys find you really sexy... Then again, dont, I want you for myself. Sorry this is taking some time, I dont get any of these solvemedia crapcraps

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Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

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An Asian, white, and a black man decide to play Russian Roulette. The Asian goes first and shoots himself in the head. The white man picks up the gun for his turn. The black man runs down the street screaming. Cops see him and the white man holding the gun, both are sent to jail for life for the murder of their friend.

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A gay man walks into McDonald's. McDonald's serves people of all sexualities.

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how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? Not enough

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops