- Anti Joke

How did Hitler fit 100 jews in his car? He didn't, he was too busy killing them in concentration camps.

Why was Dr Who unable to travel back in time using the TARDIS? Because it's just a television prop. It isn't a real time machine.

How do you confuse a conspiracy theorist? Tell them the government is not real.

If at first you don’t succeed, you clearly weren’t the right person for the job. We’re sorry, but we’re going to have to let you go; please collect your belongings and vacate the premises immediately.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Yo mama so stupid that when she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 twice instead

Two men walk in to a bar. The first man says "I'll have some H20" The second man says "I'll have some H20, too." They both received glasses of water.

Your mother is so fat that when she went to get weighed she was diagnosed as clinically obese and later broke down into tears.

Boy 1: Hey do you want my last chewing gum? Boy 2: Yeah please! Boy 1: Same. The boy continues to eat the chewing gum and finishes his shit wandering why the boy walked into the same cubicle as him.

What's Green and flies? Super Grapes cousin Super Grape

what has hair and can fly? a human.. i lied about the flying.

your so vein that doctors find you really helpful when giving you injections

What's harder than breaking up with your girlfriend? A stone.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

Why are you looking here? The joke's in your hand.

What did little Susie give to young Billy on Christmas? Genital Herpes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Triceratops

Why did the little boy die? He had cancer.

How do you get a Hooker Wet? Dump her in a River.

flavin's head

What's better than winning the Paralympics? Having legs.

Q:What's red and crawls up your leg? A: A homesick abortion

How does Hitler tie his shoes? With little Nazis.

What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? Neither one can ride a bicycle.

Katy Perry